drunk stories
- Thread starter x-loc
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nobody knows. this is HIS story. and knowing where i lived at the time i dont doubt some dude on the street knocked his ass out. He got stole on, and the dude probably ran off before he could do anything (do anything?! he got knocked the FUCK OUT!). he should just be happy he didnt get killed or stomped out.
pt 2. of the night was me ripping my friend a new asshole (no homo) after he accused the 2 black dudes at my party (nicest, squarest dudes ever too) of doing it. my friend goes "ur gonna make me cry"- i was like the drill sergeant in Full Metal Jacket, spitting in his face from talking so fast-"DAMN STRAIGHT I"LL MAKE U CRY U FUCKING BITCH WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU...." yeah i blew a gasket after that
pt 2. of the night was me ripping my friend a new asshole (no homo) after he accused the 2 black dudes at my party (nicest, squarest dudes ever too) of doing it. my friend goes "ur gonna make me cry"- i was like the drill sergeant in Full Metal Jacket, spitting in his face from talking so fast-"DAMN STRAIGHT I"LL MAKE U CRY U FUCKING BITCH WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU...." yeah i blew a gasket after that
haha, i just dont play that shit...who the fuck is someone to accuse someone else, based on some racist shit? in MY HOUSE too...like ur gonna insult someone and make them feel bad (for no reason other than u wanting to boss up on someone), and that disrespects ME and my house...not cool. my "friend" is a lil bitch too, i dont kick it with that dude anymore.
I was hella drunk when i was like 17 and we were out of cigarettes
So i went into every corner store in like 5 block radius, asked for a couple packs of cigarettes, grabbed em and broke out
One store had a display in front so I grabbed like 15 packs
I ended up with like 30 packs of cigarettes
Downside was I couldnt go into any corner stores near my house for like 6 months
Not exactly a crazy ass story but its the first one I thought of
More typical ones:
Got fucked up, didnt remember driving home, car parked perfectly in my space
Woke up next day with fat lip, bruises on face
Fell onto a patrol car hella drunk, cops called roomate to pick me up
Taken to ER with alch poisoning after passing out on beach and getting dragged back to parking lot
Robbed a square ass white guy wearing a stanford sweatshirt and asking me where to find 'marijuana'
Sideshow shit....hung out the window of a honda accord and fell out...was hella lucky some dude was on point and dragged me out the way before i could get run over
Started a fight with like 20 bikers....mostly minor shit
Thats all i can think of
So i went into every corner store in like 5 block radius, asked for a couple packs of cigarettes, grabbed em and broke out
One store had a display in front so I grabbed like 15 packs
I ended up with like 30 packs of cigarettes
Downside was I couldnt go into any corner stores near my house for like 6 months
Not exactly a crazy ass story but its the first one I thought of
More typical ones:
Got fucked up, didnt remember driving home, car parked perfectly in my space
Woke up next day with fat lip, bruises on face
Fell onto a patrol car hella drunk, cops called roomate to pick me up
Taken to ER with alch poisoning after passing out on beach and getting dragged back to parking lot
Robbed a square ass white guy wearing a stanford sweatshirt and asking me where to find 'marijuana'
Sideshow shit....hung out the window of a honda accord and fell out...was hella lucky some dude was on point and dragged me out the way before i could get run over
Started a fight with like 20 bikers....mostly minor shit
Thats all i can think of
good call, im popping the top on of these right now
heres another one...so i had some ladies over for my boys 21st bday, and there was this one fine beezy who would do almost anyone...so she goes (hella loud)-"i wanna fuck someone tonight", and i try to set it up with my boy (right? Its his bday and shit) and she goes "ugh, hes too short! fuck that" (hes 5 10, as am I but we always get this from ladies, sorry im not 6' 3"). So she decides to leave with some of her friends ("fuck this party, im out of here!") and shes in heels, and has a slice of pizza in her hand, like flat in her palm. she goes down my steps to the front door, and STACKS, like slips in her heels and hits her ass and slides down 4 steps, and throws the pizza forward (by accident) into the back of her friends head! oh how i wish i had a camera for that, it was one of the funniest things ive ever seen. These beezies tried to play it off like nothing happened, except they're crying (one from having pizza in her hair, the other from looking like a drunk slut.) good times.
heres another one...so i had some ladies over for my boys 21st bday, and there was this one fine beezy who would do almost anyone...so she goes (hella loud)-"i wanna fuck someone tonight", and i try to set it up with my boy (right? Its his bday and shit) and she goes "ugh, hes too short! fuck that" (hes 5 10, as am I but we always get this from ladies, sorry im not 6' 3"). So she decides to leave with some of her friends ("fuck this party, im out of here!") and shes in heels, and has a slice of pizza in her hand, like flat in her palm. she goes down my steps to the front door, and STACKS, like slips in her heels and hits her ass and slides down 4 steps, and throws the pizza forward (by accident) into the back of her friends head! oh how i wish i had a camera for that, it was one of the funniest things ive ever seen. These beezies tried to play it off like nothing happened, except they're crying (one from having pizza in her hair, the other from looking like a drunk slut.) good times.
blacked out apparently i sat on top of a car roof going 45, dude drivin said he was freaked out lol , before that me n my brother who only weighs 145 pounds tried to fight a gang of bikers but they left us alone , i broke into someone house and stole there food and beer , the driver who remmebers this told me i said it was a homies but i asked homeboy and he said he didnt have any beer or food missing
I think I've told this one somewhere on here before. But here it is again. Me and the homie had a shit load of 40s. We drank them all. He said I can join his drum group. But anyways, we drank all them, and waited for 6am to get there so we could get more 40s. So we got more 40s, and I blacked out. I fell off of a 3 story balcony. broke my collar bone. came to in the hospistol in restraints with a tube in my pee hole(LOL) with a neck brace on and fiending for more morphene and water. I guess I was having convos with one of the cousins that showed up, but I don't remember LOL