Question to you Fathers

[Sydal]

@ Gemini, I aint letting my kid watch that shit, just cause he dont live in the hood, probably never will, & he wont be living that lifestyle ( or mine )

Shea, I'm not questioning your ability to raise your child and be a good father...'cause I know how you are.

My ONLY question is, what if your son befriends folks from the hood, and ends up kickin' it with them at their houses? Don't have to let him watch the flick, but you'll at least kick some game in his direction about stuff like that, right?

And good for you for being vocal about the FB and cell phone thing. I'm going to be the same way. How in the hell is a kid supposed to learn social skills by text messaging and e-mailing all the damn time? I've seen 13 and 14 year olds who can text like a mf, but can't look you in the eyes and have a conversation. SAD! Keep fighting the good fight.

 

[Sydal]

The whole thing with me is, I wasn't exposed to shit like this when I was a kid. Pops was against rap music, hood movies, all that shit. I learned about this stuff when I was about 8...and when my boy died a few years later I wasn't ready to deal with that. Up until that point, I didn't think kids could be taken away forever.

So, in my eyes many lessons can come from watching a movie like this with my son at the right time. Tell him what not to do, explain reality and fiction, and then tell him about my own experiences growing up...and how some of my friends will never walk on this planet again because of similar shit.

 

[4SidedLie]

I wouldnt want my child to know the "hood" even exists.

 

[GHP]

first time i watched i was 12, it was right around the time the movie came out though. I had the whole movie quoted in about a years time.

 

[Sydal]

I wouldnt want my child to know the "hood" even exists.

Why not? Your child will find out sooner or later.

There's a way to deal with cats from the burbs, and there's a way to deal with cats from the hood. Knowing both can only be beneficial. Knowing why people act in certain ways can increase acceptance and understanding.

 

[Ghost Dance]

Sheltered ppl live sheltered lives...

With that said if your kid can comprehend the messages in this movie wheather he lives in the hood or not then I dont see a problem with it at all. I think there is a million ways to teach your kids life leassons and if a movie can help with that then take the opportunity and use it to yours and his advantage.

 

[Dhadnot]

i don't know my pops didn't give a fuck showed me whatever except for some porno type sex shit, explained things to hood shit to me, and alot of it was because i was rolling with him when LA was ruff and sometimes we seen some crazy shit like these dope dealer from 87GC beatin these dope fiends witta a bat -how can he hide that?) etc. He felt the world is crazy and you cant hide it from your kids you gotta teachem about it, but my mom was with al that disney movie hide you from the raw side of life shit so I guess I balanced out.

 

[Ghost Dance]

I wouldnt want my child to know the "hood" even exists.

Yeah and you will have that sheltered kid that goes to high school and joins a gang becuase he thinks its cool...

And then when he ends up dead or in prison you will blame it on his friends or the "ghetto trash" he hung around with.

PPL like you like to ignor the suffering and injustice that goes on in the "hood" I guess it easier for you to act like it done exists...out of site out of mind.

 

[4SidedLie]

I just dont want my kid having that kind of lifestyle

 

[Dhadnot]

you can't hide it, you gotta give your kids basic instructions when there young, a basic path to take and access life. That's the difference between joint every now and then/or lil fiend ass nigga, gettin bullied and picked on/stomping someone to death, your daughter givving it up to some guy she has dated found out to be a decent person/screwing every nigga on the HS b-ball team. Peer pressure and the world's pressure will come and it'll be a mufucka wheter in elementary, high school, college early adult yrs, but if you show your kids the world and implant in them at an early age the way they should think about and approach the world they'll be making a lot less mistakes, and pickin the lesser of two evils more often then not.

 

[Gemini]

Ironically this movie has been the discussion around the house lately. I'm proud to say he's more focused on the positive side of the movie. My son really seemed to focus in on Ricky's test score & the chance of him having the chance to go to a University. He say's, "It was all because Ice Cube pulled the gun out on them guy's. And that got his brother killed over just being stupid."

Other things he relates to are the bond between father & son, the dad cutting his son's hair etc.

The whole judgment / role model thing is this. It's common sense we as parents want better for our kids. Just like I'm sure our kids will grow up to want tattoos cause they see daddy with tattoos. That within itself is a thing that people cast judgment on, but it's up to us as parents to raise our children right in this world of hypocrites & stone throwers.

 

[L.D.S.]

Yeah and you will have that sheltered kid that goes to high school and joins a gang becuase he thinks its cool...

And then when he ends up dead or in prison you will blame it on his friends or the "ghetto trash" he hung around with.

PPL like you like to ignor the suffering and injustice that goes on in the "hood" I guess it easier for you to act like it done exists...out of site out of mind.

I do agree that a majority of people act that way and turn their nose up to the ghettos and hoods in towns, but I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to think it.

Let's be honest, though. Even if Joey never taught his kid what a ghetto was, I would think that he's highly likely to learn what one was just by simply watching a movie or a television program. There again, I believe there's an age in which your kids start watching Law & Order on tv, but the likelihood of them picking up on the slums is really high because of such.

Rap music glorifies the ghetto at the same time the artist is glorifying coming up out of it. It's a conundrum. mix the crack, steal the guns, etc, while the talk about a new house in the hills and lavish cars balances it out. That's a totally different subject, though.

You're finger pointing toward a person that simply stated what many people think, while not addressing the reason WHY he wouldn't do that.

Simply put, he's likely afraid of teaching his kid about the ghetto and it turning the kid on. It happened to me, in all honesty, and I turned out fine and survived some pretty crazy shit. That's not to say I'd put my child through the same if the situation is likely, though.

 

[Gemini]

AIDS is a reality, so is that something we need to hide from our kids too? And pretend it doesn't exist?

You can catch that from any person. Regardless if they were raised in the hood or burbs. Just because you live in the burbs (gated communities etc.) does not make you immune to the harsh realities of the world.

Explanation of the world is part of our job to tell our kids. Just like discussing the birds & the bees. The harsh realities etc.

 

[4SidedLie]

I do agree that a majority of people act that way and turn their nose up to the ghettos and hoods in towns, but I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to think it.

Let's be honest, though. Even if Joey never taught his kid what a ghetto was, I would think that he's highly likely to learn what one was just by simply watching a movie or a television program. There again, I believe there's an age in which your kids start watching Law & Order on tv, but the likelihood of them picking up on the slums is really high because of such.

Rap music glorifies the ghetto at the same time the artist is glorifying coming up out of it. It's a conundrum. mix the crack, steal the guns, etc, while the talk about a new house in the hills and lavish cars balances it out. That's a totally different subject, though.

You're finger pointing toward a person that simply stated what many people think, while not addressing the reason WHY he wouldn't do that.

Simply put, he's likely afraid of teaching his kid about the ghetto and it turning the kid on. It happened to me, in all honesty, and I turned out fine and survived some pretty crazy shit. That's not to say I'd put my child through the same if the situation is likely, though.

I had to double take when you called me by my first name hah
but Im not afraid of teaching him the ghetto and what I grew up around but I disagree with most of you teaching the kids at age 13 and what not Id rather show them how high and movies like that around the age of 15 or 16 so there would be a lesser chance of them subcoming to that lifestyle. The worst fear for my child would be him or her growing up like I did and I want to do everything in my power to prevent that from ever happening

I mean what parent would ever want that for their child?

 

[L.D.S.]

AIDS ain't got shit to do with this topic.

You can catch a case of the hoods from someone infected.

Better watch out for the ones carrying the ghetto virus. You wouldn't wanna come down with that.

 

[Gemini]

AIDS ain't got shit to do with this topic.

The point being that it's a reality.

And the point being that a lot of replies with the sort of mentally that if you just ignore it, it will go away.

 

[Sydal]

I just dont want my kid having that kind of lifestyle

Your kid will only have the lifestyle you allow them to have. In other words, what you teach him/her will mold who they become. If you teach them that lifestyle is bullshit, they are less likely to want to live it. If a father beats his wife in front of his son, his son will most likely grow up to beat his wife.

Kids who are sheltered from reality are more likely to dive head first into the very shit you shelter them from.

"Wanna know what smoking weed is like? Ask me about it and I will tell you. Then you can make a decision."

If a kid is gonna do it, a kid is gonna do it....no matter what you say. But you can help them make informed decisions.

The reality is, you can't keep them from shit...you can only teach them the good and the bad, and hope you raised them right.

 

[Sydal]

I had to double take when you called me by my first name hah
but Im not afraid of teaching him the ghetto and what I grew up around but I disagree with most of you teaching the kids at age 13 and what not Id rather show them how high and movies like that around the age of 15 or 16 so there would be a lesser chance of them subcoming to that lifestyle. The worst fear for my child would be him or her growing up like I did and I want to do everything in my power to prevent that from ever happening

I mean what parent would ever want that for their child?

If my pops had showed me shit by 13, I'd be a completely different person. I lost my best friend when I was 13, started knockin' older chicks and smoking cigs the same year (was already smoking weed since 12). I wasn't prepared to lose a friend, so the shit hit me and I stopped giving a fuck about anything...I didn't understand why "God" would let that happen to a child. While I don't regret things I've done or who I have become (because it has all grounded me in time), I wish I didn't teach myself most of the shit I know.

I learned about AIDS & STD's, cancer, and other shit by reading a Kaiser book. I learned more about the STD shit by asking my mom questions about it. 14 is when my mom said, "If you're going to do something, do it in front of me...don't sneak around behind my back." And honestly, that's how shit should be. Kids should be encouraged to ask questions...and parents should have the nuts to tell them what is.

 

[pbarb666]

I ain't a father, but for what its worth, I remember me and my friends seeing that film when it first came out in 92. We were all 12 and we thought doughboy was the shit. The entire point of the movie was lost on us until much later.

 

[Gemini]

I ain't a father, but for what its worth, I remember me and my friends seeing that film when it first came out in 92. We were all 12 and we thought doughboy was the shit. The entire point of the movie was lost on us until much later.

Your answer is within your comment. You were 12 and watched it with friends who were your age.

The discussion is watching it with your father, or an adult and discussing the movie afterward.