Question to you Fathers
- Thread starter Gemini
- Start date
I asked for an opinion, Homie. Not advice. If you re-read what I posted I had already watch the movie with my son when I started the thread.
He deploys for Afghanistan this Friday.
I see and agree with your point, but I also have to say there is a fine line. Just because we don't live in the hood, or choose that lifestyle, I choose not to hide it from him. In the end, it's a reality and I rather have him learn it & question it at home, than to learn it & try it out of curiosity in the street.
That's just me though.
He deploys for Afghanistan this Friday.
I see and agree with your point, but I also have to say there is a fine line. Just because we don't live in the hood, or choose that lifestyle, I choose not to hide it from him. In the end, it's a reality and I rather have him learn it & question it at home, than to learn it & try it out of curiosity in the street.
That's just me though.
I was basically introduced to ghetto's and slums at an early age because my nurse mother had patients on 21st Street in LR and the black side of the tracks in Lonoke, but I still wasn't subjected to the grim realities of drug addicts and prostitution until I was old enough to comprehend what was really going on.
Mom would simply tell me that the people living there had it really rough and that I should try to be thankful that my life wasn't as hard as theirs. Never did she just blatantly say "oh, the reason all those guys go into that house while I'm working is because the baby's mother is selling her body for crack rocks." That came later.
Subjecting a child to something like that at an early age, to me, doesn't help them in much capacity other than to stereotype. The culture shock came to me when I found out that two miles from my house my best friend found a meth lab on his parent's property in the middle of the woods.
Life and the things in it will do enough shocking on its own without me subjecting my child to a really dramatic and overly emotional film like Boyz in the Hood.
I am trying to understand why you'd use this video as a teaching utensil, but I unfortunately cannot.
Even if you're there explaining to your kid that a shot to the brain will kill him/her and they shouldn't use guns, the chances are you're subjecting them to that long before their taste in movies changes and movies like Spy kids teach them that eradicating big ass thumbs isn't murder if they never existed in the first place.
Mom would simply tell me that the people living there had it really rough and that I should try to be thankful that my life wasn't as hard as theirs. Never did she just blatantly say "oh, the reason all those guys go into that house while I'm working is because the baby's mother is selling her body for crack rocks." That came later.
Subjecting a child to something like that at an early age, to me, doesn't help them in much capacity other than to stereotype. The culture shock came to me when I found out that two miles from my house my best friend found a meth lab on his parent's property in the middle of the woods.
Life and the things in it will do enough shocking on its own without me subjecting my child to a really dramatic and overly emotional film like Boyz in the Hood.
I am trying to understand why you'd use this video as a teaching utensil, but I unfortunately cannot.
Even if you're there explaining to your kid that a shot to the brain will kill him/her and they shouldn't use guns, the chances are you're subjecting them to that long before their taste in movies changes and movies like Spy kids teach them that eradicating big ass thumbs isn't murder if they never existed in the first place.
There are a billion ways to teach your child while having quality time without subjecting them to something they'll likely not have to deal with until their teenage years.
It's just difference of opinion. You know your kid better than I do. I see it as too much, but he's not my child.
My dads idea of quality time was throwing me pop fly's for a couple hours in the evening or watching Friday Night Fights on ESPN. albeit it's a sport that glorifies violence, but it teaches finesse, hard work, and respect for other athletes.
I guess you could argue there's a balance in watching the film between glorification of violence and gang activity and teaching that it's not the answer and there are ways out.
There are softer things out there to have proposed that message to your child is all I'm basically trying to say.
It's just difference of opinion. You know your kid better than I do. I see it as too much, but he's not my child.
My dads idea of quality time was throwing me pop fly's for a couple hours in the evening or watching Friday Night Fights on ESPN. albeit it's a sport that glorifies violence, but it teaches finesse, hard work, and respect for other athletes.
I guess you could argue there's a balance in watching the film between glorification of violence and gang activity and teaching that it's not the answer and there are ways out.
There are softer things out there to have proposed that message to your child is all I'm basically trying to say.
I agree 100%. There is never a correct answer. It all depends on the child him/herself. We can go in circles the end results will be opinions (valued opinions, because I tend to agree with you.)
Regardless if people agree or disagree the one thing we can all agree on is, that I'd rather sit and watch movies, discuss them with him & spend time with all my kids than to be a dead beat dad.
Regardless if people agree or disagree the one thing we can all agree on is, that I'd rather sit and watch movies, discuss them with him & spend time with all my kids than to be a dead beat dad.
good question G... i wouldnt say "hey lets watch B.I.T.H."
but if he wanted to watch it if i was, it would depend on his maturity level at the time.. my children i wanna keep him away from unnecessary BS violence and adult situations( i do that by working hard and trying to put my fam in a better situation /out the hood).. i had the discussion with my dad about exposing him so he understands the street mentality(my dad never had to tell or show me i grew up in it,ill be damned if my sons have too). he said let him be kids i came back with i dont wanna raise a scared kid.. he came back yeah but let him be a kid first.. im kinda easing the reality of the world on him lil by lil.. nothing outta hand or shocking just a real explanation on life and how some people live and how to live....
but if he wanted to watch it if i was, it would depend on his maturity level at the time.. my children i wanna keep him away from unnecessary BS violence and adult situations( i do that by working hard and trying to put my fam in a better situation /out the hood).. i had the discussion with my dad about exposing him so he understands the street mentality(my dad never had to tell or show me i grew up in it,ill be damned if my sons have too). he said let him be kids i came back with i dont wanna raise a scared kid.. he came back yeah but let him be a kid first.. im kinda easing the reality of the world on him lil by lil.. nothing outta hand or shocking just a real explanation on life and how some people live and how to live....
10 is a good age...but for me it will depend on how mature my son is at that point. He's 7 1/2 months old now, so I have quite a few years to go.
Gemini, I would say watch it with your son when he fully understands what's going on. Unfortunately, that's a lot sooner for today's youth because of all the BS they grow up seeing out on the streets...it's worse than when we were all coming up.
I will watch it with my son when he understands. And like Youngnutt said, I would follow it with a discussion and explain the point of the movie. To me, Boyz N The Hood has a great lesson in it.
Gemini, I would say watch it with your son when he fully understands what's going on. Unfortunately, that's a lot sooner for today's youth because of all the BS they grow up seeing out on the streets...it's worse than when we were all coming up.
I will watch it with my son when he understands. And like Youngnutt said, I would follow it with a discussion and explain the point of the movie. To me, Boyz N The Hood has a great lesson in it.