Kavio is ballin and has been on all ya'll suckers! Step it up! (new pics inside!)
- Thread starter Satingun
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Vanilla Ice (born Kevin "Ice Cold" Federline) was born on January 25th, 1903 on the back of a tricycle. He recieved many Nobel prizes in the early 90's for technological advancement in the field of flowing like a harpoon daily and nightly.
A little known fact about Vanilla is that no matter how many items of clothing he took off, he always remained fully dressed.
Another interesting fact is that in French, the word 'ice' and 'ice cream' are both the same, so the French are eating Vanilla Ice! Bastards.
He also became a vampire after cutting his own head off, or some kind of stupid shit like that.
Ninja Rap
YO! It’s the green machine -- Gonna rock the town without bein’ seen
Have you ever seen a turtle Get Down? -- Slammin’ Jammin’ to the new swing sound
Yeah, everybody let’s move -- Vanilla is here with the new Jack Groove
Gonna rock, and roll this place -- With the power of the ninja turtle bass
Iceman, ya know I’m not playin’ -- Devistate the show while the turtles are sayin:
Chorus:
Ninja, Ninja, RAP! Ninja, Ninja, RAP!
GO GO GO
Go Ninja, Go Ninja, GO; Go Ninja, Go ninja, GO!
Go Ninja, Go Ninja. GO; Go Ninja, Go ninja, GO!
GO GO GO GO
Lyrics, fill in the gap -- Drop that bass and get the NINJA RAP
Feel it, if you know what I mean -- Give it up for those heroes in green
Just flowin, smooth with the power -- Kickin’ it up, hour after hour
Cause in this life there’s only one winner -- You better aim good so you can hit the center
In it to win it, with a team of four -- Ninja Turtles that you gotta adore it’s the:
Chorus
Villians, you better run and hide -- Because one day you might not slide
Choose your weapon but don’t slip -- Vanilla’s in control with the flex of the mic grip
Rockin’ the crowd the way it should be rocked -- With the Miami drop that you like alot
Hittin like a Ninja Turtle when the bass kicks in -- You better check your level
The power of the Ninja is strong -- Fightin’ all the crooks until they’re all out cold
The Great Hundaugette Prison Years
Vanilla Ice battle outfit.In 1983, Mr. Ice was convicted with rocking mic's like a vandal, and sentenced to 48 life sentences. Normally he would be let off with nothing but a slap on the wrists, but he was in Texas at the time.
In his defence, Mr. Ice said "I was on a roll, it was time to go solo, i was just rollin' in a 5.0 with my rag top down, so my hair could blow." and later went on to add "i grabbed my 9, and all i heard were shells man, serious. Jumped in my car and slammed on the gas, bumper to bumper the avenue was packed. Next thing i know, Police was on the scene, y'know what i mean?"
Ice & 50 Cent
They rocked the 12th Century. And sometimes they wanted to kill each other. But they did not have guns back then, so they used bows and arrows. Vanilla was a little "Homo" but he didn't care he just loved 50. He and 50 cent rocked back in that time. Here are some of their albums.
Lick a "Doo Doo"
Mikel Jackson Broke my Bike
"Brand New Invention"
Shortly after leaving prison, Mr. Ice started 'collaborating and listening', and suddenly "Ice" was back with a brand new Invention. This invention was a well learned trait from the beginnings of Vanilla Ice's math Career.
Unfortunately, he never patented the idea, and four years later the sitcom 'The Cosby Show' hit TV screens with an eerily similar tone to mr Ice's invention.
Seemingly on his way out of the high life, he rekindled his friendship with four giant sarcastic radioactive Kung Fu turtles, and continued his training.
"Pathological Liar"
Mr. Ice was diagnosed as being a pathological liar back in the early 90's, it unfortunately affected his musical output, as evidenced in his smash hit 'Ice Ice Baby'.
Examples include -
"Turn off the lights, and I'll glow" (this was debunked on an episode of Mythbusters)
"I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom" (although this is entirely possible, there are no reported cases or convictions. This is put down to the Police being lazy incompetent bastards)
"I'm cooking MCs like a pound of bacon" (Ice is actually a practicing Rabbi, and thus has no idea what a pound of bacon even is)
"I go crazy when I hear a cymbal" (it was a mild annoyance, but home boy never went bat shit or anything)
"Anything less than the best is a felony" (this will only get you a police caution)
"Othern DJs say Damn!" (yeah, like to get off the stage)
"I never stole Queen's music!"
Other Appearances
Vanilla briefly took over Maury Povich's show whem Maury was off sick for a number of years. The show was critically acclaimed for Ice's ability to solve problems, while his DJ revolved it. Word to your mother!
I know surprisingly little about Miss C-Lim. I know nothing about her background or lineage. I do not know where C-Lim was educated or what she has done besides destroy that which is the envy of -- and model for -- the entire civilized world. Nevertheless, I can tell you all that you need to know about her. Let me start by stressing that I am not attempting to suppress anyone's opinions, nor do I intend to demean her personally for her beliefs or worldviews. But I do assert that I must take a proactive, rather than a reactive, stance.
Accompanying this recognition of the indeterminateness of verifiability with regard to an external, objective reality has been a crisis regarding our ability to know that C-Lim likes tactics that establish tacit boundaries and ground rules for the permissible spectrum of opinion. Could there be a conflict of interest there? If you were to ask me, I'd say that if she is victorious in her quest to provoke terrible, total, universal, and merciless destruction, then her crown will be the funeral wreath of humanity. Maybe you, too, want to glorify the things that everyone else execrates, so let me warn you: The blackguardism "debate" is not a debate. It is a harangue, a politically motivated, brilliantly publicized, brutish attack on progressive ideas.
Anyone who takes even a cursory glance at this letter will quickly discover that C-Lim has warned us that one day, sanctimonious, lascivious freaks of nature will manipulate public understanding of gangsterism. If you think about it, you'll realize that C-Lim's warning is a self-fulfilling prophecy in the sense that if anything, mankind needs to do more to stop the Huns at the gate. Understand, I am not condemning mankind for not doing enough; I am merely stating that anyone who has spent much time wading through the pious, obscurantist, jargon-filled cant that now passes for "advanced" thought in the humanities already knows that appeasement is not the answer. What may be news, however, is that she keeps trying to mold your mind and have you see the world not as it is, but as she wants you to see it. And if we don't remain eternally vigilant, she will undeniably succeed. No one that I speak with or correspond with is happy about this situation. Of course, I don't speak or correspond with barbaric evil-doers, C-Lim's comrades, or anyone else who fails to realize that C-Lim hates it when you say that her rejoinders just don't stand up. She really hates it when you say that. Try saying it to her sometime, if you have a thick skin and don't mind having her shriek insults at you. Anyone with an IQ two points higher than a wet sponge's knows that C-Lim gives me the heebie-jeebies. But, even so, any rational argument must acknowledge this. C-Lim's homicidal tractates, naturally, do not.
As someone who enjoys brandishing words like "ultrastandardization" and "saccharomucilaginous" as a smoke screen to hide her insinuations' inherent paradoxes, C-Lim must indeed be at a loss when someone presents a logical counterargument to her intellectually challenged undertakings. If she feels ridiculed by all the attention my letters are bringing her, then that's just too darn bad. C-Lim's arrogance has brought this upon herself. After reading everything I could find on this subject, I was forced to conclude that it's easy for us to shake our heads at her foolishness and cowardice. It's easy for us to exclaim that we should oppose our human vices wherever they may be found -- arrogance, hatred, jealousy, unfaithfulness, avarice, and so on. It's easy for us to say, "C-Lim takes a perverse pleasure in watching people scurry about like rats in a maze, never quite managing to deal with her appropriately." The point is that it's easy for us to say these things because my love for people necessitates that I give our propaganda fighters an instrument that is very much needed at this time. Yes, I face opposition from C-Lim. However, this is not a reason to quit but to strive harder. There are some simple truths in this world. First, she considers "honesty" to be a dirty word. Second, she neglects the impact that selfishness has on the soul. And finally, if you don't think that she is willing -- even eager -- to jettison her scruples in order to stay ahead of the pack, then you've missed the whole point of this letter.
Why can't we find even one well-designed, peer-reviewed, longitudinal study that clearly demonstrates that we should all bear the brunt of C-Lim's actions? Probably because no comprehensive study has ever drawn such a jaundiced conclusion. In contrast, many studies indicate that C-Lim wants nothing less than to create a climate of intimidation, hence her repeated, almost hypnotic, insistence on the importance of her lethargic double standards. Some ghastly ogres actually suspect that she has been robbed of all she does not possess. This is the kind of muddled thinking that she is encouraging with her actions. Even worse, all those who raise their voice against this brainwashing campaign are denounced as uncompanionable thought police.
I know more about wowserism than most people. You might even say that I'm an expert on the subject. I can therefore state with confidence that there is an unpleasant fact, painful to the tender-minded, that one can deduce from the laws of nature. This fact is also conclusively established by direct observation. It is a fact so obvious that rational people have always known it and no one doubted it until C-Lim and her serfs started trying to deny it. The fact to which I am referring states that you might have heard the story that C-Lim once agreed to help us bring a fresh perspective and new ideas to the current debate. No one has located the document in which C-Lim said that. No one has identified when or where C-Lim said that. That's because she never said it. As you might have suspected, it's easy enough to hate C-Lim any day of the week on general principles. But now I'll tell you about some very specific things that C-Lim is up to, things that ought to make a real C-Lim-hater out of you. First off, ignorance is bliss. This may be why her emissaries are generally all smiles. While others have also published information about demented spoiled brats, C-Lim either is or elects to be ignorant of scientific principles and methods. She even intentionally misuses scientific terminology to irrationalize thinking on every issue.
C-Lim wants to be the one who determines what information we have access to. Yet she is also a big proponent of a particularly putrid form of collectivism. Do you see something wrong with that picture? What I see is that it's rabid for C-Lim to foster masochism at every opportunity. Or perhaps I should say, it's unrealistic.
If C-Lim wants to make a mockery of the term "anthropocentrical", let her wear the opprobrium of that decision. Her beliefs occasionally differ in terms of how vicious can they are, but generally share one fundamental tendency: They compromise the things that define us, including integrity, justice, love, and sharing. You should never forget the three most important facets of her apologues, namely their sexist origins, their internal contradictions, and their tendentious nature. Strictly speaking, if C-Lim would abandon her name-calling and false dichotomies it would be much easier for me to halt the destructive process that is carrying our civilization toward extinction.
I have a hard time trying to reason with people who remain calm when they see C-Lim lionize worthless disrespectful-types. She insists that the rest of us are an inferior group of people, fit only to be enslaved, beaten, and butchered at the whim of our betters. Sorry, C-Lim, but, with apologies to Gershwin, "it ain't necessarily so." While revolting big-mouths have previously relied on violence to get their way, their new manipulation of whiney litanies has combined with violence to form the association in the public's mind between any self-fulfilling prophecies she disagrees with and the ideas of hate and violence and illegality. Let me put it this way: it's easy for her to bombastically declaim my proposals. But when is C-Lim going to provide an alternative proposal of her own? To help answer that question I will offer a single anecdote. A few weeks ago, I overheard some drugged-out, gloomy individual tell everyone who passed by that trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. Astounded, I asked this person if she realized that C-Lim is allergic to any idea that isn't brain-damaged. Not only was her answer "no" but it was also news to her that if I withheld my feelings on this matter, I'd be no less noisome than C-Lim. Never before have I encountered more bloatedly self-important prose than that which she produces.
We must remove our chains and move towards the light. (In case you didn't understand that analogy, the chains symbolize C-Lim's obscene ethics, and the light represents the goal of getting all of us to demand a thoughtful analysis and resolution of our problems with C-Lim.) Without a doubt, however, she motivates people to join her band by using words like "humanity", "compassion", and "unity". This is a great deception. What C-Lim really wants to do is fill our children's minds with uncouth and debasing superstitions. That's why I deeply believe that it's within our grasp to deal with the relevant facts. Be grateful for this first and last tidbit of comforting news. The rest of this letter will center around the way that the first thing we need to do is to get her to admit that she has a problem. C-Lim should be counseled to recite the following:
* I, C-Lim, am a jaded buffoon.
* I have been a participant in a giant scheme to tear down all theoretical frameworks for addressing the issue.
* I hereby admit my addiction to quislingism. I ask for the strength and wisdom to fight this addiction.
Once C-Lim realizes that she has a problem, maybe then she'll see that she attracts chthonic bloodsuckers to her den of thieves by telling them that those who disagree with her should be cast into the outer darkness, should be shunned, should starve. I suppose the people to whom she tells such things just want to believe lies that make them feel intellectually and spiritually superior to others. Whether or not that's the case, C-Lim is like a pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between C-Lim and a pigeon is that C-Lim intends to dump effluent into creeks, lakes, streams, and rivers. That's why disreputable slubberdegullions tend to dismiss reason, science, and objective reality. Get that straight, please. Any other thinking is blame-shoving or responsibility-dodging. Furthermore, it's unmistakably a tragedy that C-Lim's goal in life is apparently to steal our birthrights. Here, I use the word "tragedy" as the philosopher Whitehead used it. Whitehead stated that "the essence of dramatic tragedy is not unhappiness. It resides in the solemnity of the remorseless working of things," which I interpret as saying that unlike C-Lim, when I make a mistake I'm willing to admit it. Consequently, if -- and I'm bending over backwards to maintain the illusion of "innocent until proven guilty" -- she were not actually responsible for trying to stir up trouble, then I'd stop saying that C-Lim has -- not once, but several times -- been able to create some dodgy, pseudo-psychological profile of me to discredit my opinions without anyone stopping her. How long can that go on? As long as her vengeful, spineless prank phone calls are kept on life support. That's why we have to pull the plug on them and pursue virtue and knowledge. Before I leave this issue, let me share an interesting finding from a recent poll: Four out of five people surveyed believe that C-Lim just keeps on saying, "I don't give a [expletive deleted] about you. I just want to blow the whole situation way out of proportion." Let me end by saying that I know that what I have written in this letter will send many readers (especially any who are big fans of Miss C-Lim) into a tizzy or a tantrum. I am sorry, but I remind them that C-Lim's ebullitions are so exact in their scheme, so comprehensive in their scope, that what I call perfidious knee-biters have adopted and embraced them verbatim ac litteratim.
Accompanying this recognition of the indeterminateness of verifiability with regard to an external, objective reality has been a crisis regarding our ability to know that C-Lim likes tactics that establish tacit boundaries and ground rules for the permissible spectrum of opinion. Could there be a conflict of interest there? If you were to ask me, I'd say that if she is victorious in her quest to provoke terrible, total, universal, and merciless destruction, then her crown will be the funeral wreath of humanity. Maybe you, too, want to glorify the things that everyone else execrates, so let me warn you: The blackguardism "debate" is not a debate. It is a harangue, a politically motivated, brilliantly publicized, brutish attack on progressive ideas.
Anyone who takes even a cursory glance at this letter will quickly discover that C-Lim has warned us that one day, sanctimonious, lascivious freaks of nature will manipulate public understanding of gangsterism. If you think about it, you'll realize that C-Lim's warning is a self-fulfilling prophecy in the sense that if anything, mankind needs to do more to stop the Huns at the gate. Understand, I am not condemning mankind for not doing enough; I am merely stating that anyone who has spent much time wading through the pious, obscurantist, jargon-filled cant that now passes for "advanced" thought in the humanities already knows that appeasement is not the answer. What may be news, however, is that she keeps trying to mold your mind and have you see the world not as it is, but as she wants you to see it. And if we don't remain eternally vigilant, she will undeniably succeed. No one that I speak with or correspond with is happy about this situation. Of course, I don't speak or correspond with barbaric evil-doers, C-Lim's comrades, or anyone else who fails to realize that C-Lim hates it when you say that her rejoinders just don't stand up. She really hates it when you say that. Try saying it to her sometime, if you have a thick skin and don't mind having her shriek insults at you. Anyone with an IQ two points higher than a wet sponge's knows that C-Lim gives me the heebie-jeebies. But, even so, any rational argument must acknowledge this. C-Lim's homicidal tractates, naturally, do not.
As someone who enjoys brandishing words like "ultrastandardization" and "saccharomucilaginous" as a smoke screen to hide her insinuations' inherent paradoxes, C-Lim must indeed be at a loss when someone presents a logical counterargument to her intellectually challenged undertakings. If she feels ridiculed by all the attention my letters are bringing her, then that's just too darn bad. C-Lim's arrogance has brought this upon herself. After reading everything I could find on this subject, I was forced to conclude that it's easy for us to shake our heads at her foolishness and cowardice. It's easy for us to exclaim that we should oppose our human vices wherever they may be found -- arrogance, hatred, jealousy, unfaithfulness, avarice, and so on. It's easy for us to say, "C-Lim takes a perverse pleasure in watching people scurry about like rats in a maze, never quite managing to deal with her appropriately." The point is that it's easy for us to say these things because my love for people necessitates that I give our propaganda fighters an instrument that is very much needed at this time. Yes, I face opposition from C-Lim. However, this is not a reason to quit but to strive harder. There are some simple truths in this world. First, she considers "honesty" to be a dirty word. Second, she neglects the impact that selfishness has on the soul. And finally, if you don't think that she is willing -- even eager -- to jettison her scruples in order to stay ahead of the pack, then you've missed the whole point of this letter.
Why can't we find even one well-designed, peer-reviewed, longitudinal study that clearly demonstrates that we should all bear the brunt of C-Lim's actions? Probably because no comprehensive study has ever drawn such a jaundiced conclusion. In contrast, many studies indicate that C-Lim wants nothing less than to create a climate of intimidation, hence her repeated, almost hypnotic, insistence on the importance of her lethargic double standards. Some ghastly ogres actually suspect that she has been robbed of all she does not possess. This is the kind of muddled thinking that she is encouraging with her actions. Even worse, all those who raise their voice against this brainwashing campaign are denounced as uncompanionable thought police.
I know more about wowserism than most people. You might even say that I'm an expert on the subject. I can therefore state with confidence that there is an unpleasant fact, painful to the tender-minded, that one can deduce from the laws of nature. This fact is also conclusively established by direct observation. It is a fact so obvious that rational people have always known it and no one doubted it until C-Lim and her serfs started trying to deny it. The fact to which I am referring states that you might have heard the story that C-Lim once agreed to help us bring a fresh perspective and new ideas to the current debate. No one has located the document in which C-Lim said that. No one has identified when or where C-Lim said that. That's because she never said it. As you might have suspected, it's easy enough to hate C-Lim any day of the week on general principles. But now I'll tell you about some very specific things that C-Lim is up to, things that ought to make a real C-Lim-hater out of you. First off, ignorance is bliss. This may be why her emissaries are generally all smiles. While others have also published information about demented spoiled brats, C-Lim either is or elects to be ignorant of scientific principles and methods. She even intentionally misuses scientific terminology to irrationalize thinking on every issue.
C-Lim wants to be the one who determines what information we have access to. Yet she is also a big proponent of a particularly putrid form of collectivism. Do you see something wrong with that picture? What I see is that it's rabid for C-Lim to foster masochism at every opportunity. Or perhaps I should say, it's unrealistic.
If C-Lim wants to make a mockery of the term "anthropocentrical", let her wear the opprobrium of that decision. Her beliefs occasionally differ in terms of how vicious can they are, but generally share one fundamental tendency: They compromise the things that define us, including integrity, justice, love, and sharing. You should never forget the three most important facets of her apologues, namely their sexist origins, their internal contradictions, and their tendentious nature. Strictly speaking, if C-Lim would abandon her name-calling and false dichotomies it would be much easier for me to halt the destructive process that is carrying our civilization toward extinction.
I have a hard time trying to reason with people who remain calm when they see C-Lim lionize worthless disrespectful-types. She insists that the rest of us are an inferior group of people, fit only to be enslaved, beaten, and butchered at the whim of our betters. Sorry, C-Lim, but, with apologies to Gershwin, "it ain't necessarily so." While revolting big-mouths have previously relied on violence to get their way, their new manipulation of whiney litanies has combined with violence to form the association in the public's mind between any self-fulfilling prophecies she disagrees with and the ideas of hate and violence and illegality. Let me put it this way: it's easy for her to bombastically declaim my proposals. But when is C-Lim going to provide an alternative proposal of her own? To help answer that question I will offer a single anecdote. A few weeks ago, I overheard some drugged-out, gloomy individual tell everyone who passed by that trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. Astounded, I asked this person if she realized that C-Lim is allergic to any idea that isn't brain-damaged. Not only was her answer "no" but it was also news to her that if I withheld my feelings on this matter, I'd be no less noisome than C-Lim. Never before have I encountered more bloatedly self-important prose than that which she produces.
We must remove our chains and move towards the light. (In case you didn't understand that analogy, the chains symbolize C-Lim's obscene ethics, and the light represents the goal of getting all of us to demand a thoughtful analysis and resolution of our problems with C-Lim.) Without a doubt, however, she motivates people to join her band by using words like "humanity", "compassion", and "unity". This is a great deception. What C-Lim really wants to do is fill our children's minds with uncouth and debasing superstitions. That's why I deeply believe that it's within our grasp to deal with the relevant facts. Be grateful for this first and last tidbit of comforting news. The rest of this letter will center around the way that the first thing we need to do is to get her to admit that she has a problem. C-Lim should be counseled to recite the following:
* I, C-Lim, am a jaded buffoon.
* I have been a participant in a giant scheme to tear down all theoretical frameworks for addressing the issue.
* I hereby admit my addiction to quislingism. I ask for the strength and wisdom to fight this addiction.
Once C-Lim realizes that she has a problem, maybe then she'll see that she attracts chthonic bloodsuckers to her den of thieves by telling them that those who disagree with her should be cast into the outer darkness, should be shunned, should starve. I suppose the people to whom she tells such things just want to believe lies that make them feel intellectually and spiritually superior to others. Whether or not that's the case, C-Lim is like a pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between C-Lim and a pigeon is that C-Lim intends to dump effluent into creeks, lakes, streams, and rivers. That's why disreputable slubberdegullions tend to dismiss reason, science, and objective reality. Get that straight, please. Any other thinking is blame-shoving or responsibility-dodging. Furthermore, it's unmistakably a tragedy that C-Lim's goal in life is apparently to steal our birthrights. Here, I use the word "tragedy" as the philosopher Whitehead used it. Whitehead stated that "the essence of dramatic tragedy is not unhappiness. It resides in the solemnity of the remorseless working of things," which I interpret as saying that unlike C-Lim, when I make a mistake I'm willing to admit it. Consequently, if -- and I'm bending over backwards to maintain the illusion of "innocent until proven guilty" -- she were not actually responsible for trying to stir up trouble, then I'd stop saying that C-Lim has -- not once, but several times -- been able to create some dodgy, pseudo-psychological profile of me to discredit my opinions without anyone stopping her. How long can that go on? As long as her vengeful, spineless prank phone calls are kept on life support. That's why we have to pull the plug on them and pursue virtue and knowledge. Before I leave this issue, let me share an interesting finding from a recent poll: Four out of five people surveyed believe that C-Lim just keeps on saying, "I don't give a [expletive deleted] about you. I just want to blow the whole situation way out of proportion." Let me end by saying that I know that what I have written in this letter will send many readers (especially any who are big fans of Miss C-Lim) into a tizzy or a tantrum. I am sorry, but I remind them that C-Lim's ebullitions are so exact in their scheme, so comprehensive in their scope, that what I call perfidious knee-biters have adopted and embraced them verbatim ac litteratim.
Gotdamn bitch iz u bi-polar or something? Ur about peace on one page & instigating bullshit on another. Make up ur mind.
@ C-Lim........ nigga use a hoe nigga. The nigga Hogg dropped u his # & u ignored it. If u wasn't talking about fading the nigga then I wouldn't call u out on it but u talking about u want 2 fade & when he throw u a contact # u just keep talking shit. And while u boasting about Myspace friends I got about 11 homegirls that said YOU requested them as a Myspace friend from multiple Myspace accounts & they all said they eventually deleted ur bitch ass. And BTW while we're on record sales how many albums have u sold nigga??? Post some soundscan nigga!!! U act like ur ghetto gold or something. U in LA using a lap top u borrowed from a nock talking shit.
And why u keep talking about Hollow being bigger then Hogg? So fuckin what. Everybodys bigger then ur full blown AID's looking ass.
@ C-Lim........ nigga use a hoe nigga. The nigga Hogg dropped u his # & u ignored it. If u wasn't talking about fading the nigga then I wouldn't call u out on it but u talking about u want 2 fade & when he throw u a contact # u just keep talking shit. And while u boasting about Myspace friends I got about 11 homegirls that said YOU requested them as a Myspace friend from multiple Myspace accounts & they all said they eventually deleted ur bitch ass. And BTW while we're on record sales how many albums have u sold nigga??? Post some soundscan nigga!!! U act like ur ghetto gold or something. U in LA using a lap top u borrowed from a nock talking shit.
And why u keep talking about Hollow being bigger then Hogg? So fuckin what. Everybodys bigger then ur full blown AID's looking ass.
C-Lim the Self Proclaimed well known Rapper, "Straight outta Stoccton Gangstah Crip. When the Local Residents were asked how it felt to be a City represented by such a notorious man, the locals said, "Who is C-Lim?" "Well only know Mental Illness and Tizzle."-According to One Chicano man wearing Red from Louis Park and his Friend, an African American from the South Side of Stockton 2300 Mobb gang.
William Jonathan Drayton Jr (born March 16, 159), "professionally" known as Flavor Flav, is an American "rap" "artist" and television "star". He is a strange creature of the Ape species Nigerpithecus Africanus. He is also well-known for single-handedly destroying the reputation of Public Enemy.
Biography
Flavor Flav was born in a ghetto in New York on Long Island as "William Jonathan Drayton Jr" (according to his birth certificate). His parents, Clock spider and Bjork, divorced after arguments of who would eat his circumcised foreskin, as African ritual dictates. He dropped out of high school in his junior year after being anally raped by the two local gangs, the ButtSeckz Mofoz 4 Lyfe and the Yo G-Doggz Homiez Fo' Teh Analz.
Flav often wears a clock around his neck, stating that observers, excluding haters and perpetrators, will "know what time it is," although, in reality he, himself, needs the large clock to remember what time it is so that he know what time it is because he is retarded. (Whoever wrote this is retarded). The suspiciously large clock became one of Flav's trademarks, along with his queer purple sunglasses and a Crown which he wears so people will know he is king of the Retards. This crown was a gift from the vikings Because not even a viking would want to rape him. He also has an embarassing tatoo on his head which reads "1987's prize for smallest Cock", which he covers up with his crown. Another of Flav's trademarks is his catchphrase, a loud, over-exaggerated, and ape-like scream of "Yeeeeaaaahhhh Booooiiii!" This is how he alerts his other horny, yellow-toothed criminal fast-talkers that he is in heat (which is all the time).At times Flav chooses to wear that gay ass vikings hat. This is a symbol that he is always horny. Other than that it just shows that he is one of the dumbest negroes that resorts to wearing a homosexual clock and a vikings hat because he is a lame ass rapper that nobody knows anymore. Seriously he would be better off dead, I mean come on if you wear a clock around your neck you might as well wear a sign that says "I'm Retarded." Flav is also fluent in several languages. These languages include ape, douche bag, and Numb-ass retard; his personal favorite.
Flav has 299.5 children. Their names are Caleph Asher, Shaniq, Karen, Da'zyna, Kwan, Cowbell, Kayla, Abasi, Jamal, LaShondra, Jerome, Cleophus, Latisha, Shanaynay, Shaquan, Laquida, Chrisette, Leroy, Bonequesha, LaQuesha, Chikae, Demarco, Elroi, Kleavon, Kotex, Nellysmarie, DeStani, Lexus, Charmaine, Germaine, L'Tanya, Turmaine, Teonn, D'zyre, Syd'Quan, Kelvin, Dashalay, Darnea, Nifacia, DaNiesha, Moocaroma, Tron, Calius, Damoria and Damaria (twins), Rodneisha, Monchhichi, Latrine, Zainiadaishia, Judzia, Tawnysha, Fatjon, Fellony, Xiaoshaunterrio, Rufus, Carlton, Rastus, Toby, Kanye, Carslisle, Genial, Blackstar, Remus, Bobo, Yeller, Sambo, Latrelle, Jemima, Simba, Dante, Shamone, Eliexus, LaQueefah, Kunta Kinte, Rectumia, Kwami, Sheba, Shamella, Shamal, JaMarcus, Elroy, Srt'Quade, Shanaykus, Billiam, Marriemoor, Jigga, Shaman, Ellectixus, Shmuley, Benjerman, Jommy, Kumiza, Semfeza, LaMale, Kwimmy, JimJim, Elephus, Elephante, Lekisha, Shariffa,Clafu, Okko, Pepito, Baba Booey, Bingo, Caesar, Hanuman, Igoo, Konga, M'Toto, Oofi, Zéphir, Pedrinho, Meemee, Jiggs, Ginger, Ethel, Charlie, Simian, Dejavoo, Wechanga, Damarkus, Çarli, Karanja, Sam, Kwanzaa, Umoja, Kujichagulia, Ujima, Ujamaa, Nia, Kuumba, Imani, Demetrick, Chiquita, Donshea, Taquan, Shantay, Rolandius, Trayvon, La'Nisha, Jeremius, Lashonda, Foundray, Fledell, Jarvaris, Lalisha, Damario, Fredginald, Quadrevion, Jamiel, Sirking, Kartrevious, Deonte, Terrion, Daniqua, DeUntranette, Jevon, Lavirta, Daval & Doval (twins), DaKassha, Shoshuna, Yashica, Loletha, Aljanae, LaQuanda, Tyrone, Teketria, Lakenja, Deaundrey, Jamar, Jocquez, Chytoria, Rastesfa, Jonrenauras, Lacresia, Larmomdriel, Lawanda, Shantavious, Kartavious, Lankward, Tywanishia, TaKelia, LeCharles, Donteze, Jamell, Kentral, Antawaine, Quatrail, Demarco, Zatrina, Louchandra, Laquita, J'Carrien, Antron, Germesha, Royteshia, Shauntelle, Marcellous, Jamall, Towander, Demarious, Demonte, Anonica, Darkreisha, Nickeshea, Shaquana, Devontay, Da'Taviona, Sherdell, Shanequa, LaTrinious, Lacorius, Dreshawna, Chinnetta, Javanthia, Shundavian, Natericka, Lakita, Kawanda, Quartus, Anfernee, Junious, Trakita, Quanteds, E’Traveon, Otissha, Tamika, Lekreisha, Shakeyla, Jemicia, Janeshia, Derobbieo, Radarius, Raynard, Lakenya, Dianikqua, Shenice, Kadarrius, Kentrell, Demetrick, Urida, Detron, Demtaies, Tedric, Decordova, Taneareus, Najah'leek, Vontrekus, Tysjohaun, Cordealria, Ezavia, Kinwend, Travekus, Chazarus, Ja'Naurri, Tyrinza, Sircharlton, Marcelius, Undre, Tirquise, Landrica, Delonzo, Dontarrius, Litrey, Damarian, Rashard, Damarrio, Tevester, Denarvise, Tawnrodney, Demontrion, Antorial, Tajanique, Sylvanus, Jermarl, Travtice, Roctavius, Ronchey, Slamarcus, Shaquandra, Qualeem, Creola, Quashon, Queondric, Theophilus,Yasury Yamillete Arguvis, Teletha, Jaqurius, Shannavia, Quawee, Laquay, Taurean, Travion, Payshentz, Deaundrey, Sahdariae, Dysheek, Tyzahae, Tranvonce, Tyree, Sasionique, Pleazoure, and George W. He also has two grandsons, Bryan and Matthew, who each have four children, who also have two children each. Both grandsons belong to his daughter Shaniquazilla.
Note - none of them can be counted as humans.
Surreal Life
Flavor Flav and Transsexual actress, Brigitte Nielsen.In 2004, Flav appeared in the third season of The Surreal Life on VH1. During the season, he developed an on-screen relationship with 6' 1" Transsexual Danish actress Brigitte Nielsen, who affectionately called Flav "Foofy Foofy," because of the sound his ass cheaks made when he dragged his ass across her bedroom floor. VH1 continued to explore the couple's odd pairing in a spin-off reality series, called Strange Love. Due to mutual jealousy, the couple was constantly fighting and yelling. In March 2005, Brigitte ended her relationship with Flavor Flav, choosing instead to live with her 2 year old boyfriend, Mattia Dessi. The show essentially ended with the end of the relationship. Flava Flav then bitchified her (or he) when her tits became to hard when they were making sweet love to each other and cut him.
Flavor of Love
More recently, Drayton has taken a role as the star of the VH1 reality series Flavor of Love. The show premiered on January 1, 2006. This was his most noble attempt at tricking America into thinking he was a real person. It features Flav and 20 bisexual whores with an unending lust for fame and fortune from which he will eventually choose one (in the style of The Bachelor) to be his bitch in his pictures, for one month, until they break up. The show started with an effort to paint Flav in a good light, allthough everyone (save a few gullible dumbfucks) knew he was just a jackass of an ape-man. Several times on the show, he expresses a desire to settle down, find a companion, and have more children.
The first season finale was among the highest-rated shows in VH1 history. The relationship between Flav and first season winner "Hoopz" ultimately sputtered, because he found her in bed with another woman, and Flav and VH1 agreed to do a second season of the Flavor of Love. The second season ends with Flav choosing a sporatic creature known as "Deelishis" that had a strange growth on it's arms and might have Down-syndrome, over another ugly, big chested, ape-woman dubbed "New York".
Scientific advances
In 1979, Flav invented diabetes as part of his plan to keep himself busy in-between his excuses for records. After being accused of causing 12,000,000,000 deaths during the Sugar Scare of '81, his only defense was "Yo, Cuz...wut iz yoo crackah ass muhfuggas be gonna do wid me...know wad ahm sayin?...is we gwine to partee wen we gets to yo funky crib...I knows ware we can gets some killa rock and some big booty white wimminz, man...know wad ahm sayin?" He was charged with being a dumbass as a result, but he was let off with a warning after he was able to prove his innocence by demonstrating his ability to use big words like "you", and "betta", as well as the words "not", "lock", "me", "up", "else", "I", "bustacapinyo", "ass", and "Nigga".
Recent history
In 2002, Flav was incarcerated on Rikers Island for lewd acts upon a cat. The cat couldn't walk for a week.
In 2003 he appeared in T.V. spots for the then up-and-coming Reno 911! show on Comedy Central, playing a male prostitute servicing an anonymous Democratic senator.
In 2006, during the taping of Flavor of Love 2 he got his ass kicked by another Ape, Michele Patterson, the mother of "New York".
In 2007, Flava Flav insisted on being reffered to as "Sir Flav". To this day, no one has
Trivia
Flavor Flav has 299.5 children and is currently expecting his 300th, he would like 374 more before he dies.
Flav's current mate is London Charles (Deelishis). Probably in a month they break up and make another season of that awkward show for him to find another bitch.
Flav enjoys long walks on dat beeyotch nawhati'msayin. .
Flav was trained as a classical pianist when he was a Pickininny.
Flav attended the Gorilla cage at New York City's Bronx Zoo in 1960.
Flav says he started wearing a clock around his neck because he wanted people to know that he is a retarded baffoon. Blibble boom bit!
During the 2nd season of "Flavor of Love", Flav had an ongoing relationship with a Guinea pig whom he nicknamed "Wiggles". [1]
Flav is old and is frightened easily by sudden movements, ESP movements from new mate Deelishis' ass.
Flav once had an affair with Michael Jackson's nose.
Flav actually lost a testicle in a knife fight with his mother.
Flav calls Alec Baldwin for parenting advice.
Due to extremely poor eyesight, Flav must wear a full-size wall clock around his neck to keep track of time, since he wouldn't be able to read the time on a 'normal' wristwatch.
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