Happy New Years and FUCK THAT FUCKIN FAGGOT ASS FAGGOT ON A BIKE IN SF THAT ALMOST GOT ME ARRESTED!
So I'm driving around SF leaving the mission looking for an afterspot and there's a bit of traffic and honking in the right lane.....turns out it was some guy on a bicycle riding in the middle of the lane going slow as fuck not allowing cars to get by him in the lane....as Im passing in the right lane my passenger says out the window "Breh watch out, you're gonna get hit riding like that"....I end up in front of him and stop at a red light, so the faggot ass faggot gets in front of me and starts going hella slow....I'm honking and shit and he still won't move even though there's plenty of lane space if he was to ride next to the parked cars like a normal human being on a bike....so I get around him again and as I'm about to stop at another red light I move closer to the parked cars so he can't pass.....the guy starts to go around so I move a little to the right so he can't pass again, he then goes around the right lane in the oncoming traffic's lane and see's a cop about to make a turn.....the faggot ass faggot flags him down and starts pointing at my car.....light turns green, cop immediately turns on lights and cuts everybody off to pull me over.
I'm fucked. I got a suspended license, I'm drunk and have already had a dui, car smells like hella weed, there's a fifth of ciroc that I drank half of somewhere in the back seat and probably visible to the cops and my passenger is on 4-way felony search & curfew.
the cop asks for my license, I give him my ID, he asks for my passengers license and he gives the cop something with his generic ass name on it so the probation won't come up. the cop comes back and says I smell like alcohol and that the guy on the bike said I tried to kill him with my car....he asks me if I want my car towed ("Aww, please don't tow my car!), where I'm going (home!), and tells me if any other cop pulls me over I'm gonna fail the sobriety test. He hands me back he cards, says he didn't really believe the guy on the bike and tells us happy new year.
Shit, not getting arrested made my new year a happy one!