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infinity

( o )( o )
May 4, 2005
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UOENO, CA
Greetings, everyone. I am new. (One second – let me get this spork out of the way.) My name is Katy, but you can call me the Penguin of Doom. (I’m laughing aloud.) As you can plainly see, my actions have no pattern whatsoever. That is why I have come here. To meet similarly patternless individuals, such as myself.
I am 13 – mature for my age, however! – and I enjoy watching Invader Zim with my girlfriend. (I am bisexual. Please approach this subject maturely.) It is our favorite television show, as it adequately displays stochastic manners of behavior such as we possess.
She behaves without order – of course – but I wish to meet more individuals of her and my kind. As the saying goes, “the more, the merrier.”
Ah, it is to laugh. Anyway, I hope to make many friends here, so please comment freely.
Doom!
That is simply one of many examples of my random actions. Ha, ha. Fare thee well. I wish you much love and waffles.
Yours,
The Penguin of Doom.
 

infinity

( o )( o )
May 4, 2005
16,189
64,829
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UOENO, CA
Wow. Just you wait. My son is a professional internet fighter and oh shit he's arrived just right now. Hope you're ready, cocksucker. Take it away Jimmy.
Hey big fat faggot ill bite your face cunt talking shit about me family?!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!1111 hahahhahahahahahhhahahahahaahahhahahaahahhha PENGUIN WAFFLES lel sorry im random nah but really somebody tld me that you eat clown dicks is that true faggot hahahahhahahahahahahahha also i fucked urb itch dont talk shit about my dad fat nigger just because my mom is fucking Pineapple doesnt mean my dads not the same man also my dogs name is Pineapple btw incase u didnt catch dat HOLDS UP SPORK I slammed my fucking 10inch dick into ur moms pussy and vagina at the same time do you even know whoi am faggot WAFFLEZ WAFFLEZ WAFFLEZ WAFFLEZWAFFLEZ WAFFLEZ WAFFLEZ WAFFLEZ XDDDDDDDDDDDD oooops sory i have tourettes and im random also fuck off of course ul ook fat because you eat too much kfc thats what dad was saying your a fat rude bitch fuck urself
 

infinity

( o )( o )
May 4, 2005
16,189
64,829
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UOENO, CA
u can see im a real savage. thats why i came here, 2 meet &#55357;&#56495;% no chill ppl like me&#8230; im 16 years old (i got first hand street experience tho!!) i like 2 Netflix n chill w/ my sidepiece (cuz you know this ain't my main one, smdh) bcuz da pussy is straight fire!!!! shes savage 2 of course but i want 2 meet more savage ppl =) like they say the more lit the squad the more lit the pussy!!!! lol&#8230;neways i hope 2 make a big squad here so give me lots of retweets!!!! WHYTHISNIGGADRAKELOOKLIKEASAUDIWARLORD?????!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein savage again _^ hehe&#8230;stay real fam!!! ! !
 

infinity

( o )( o )
May 4, 2005
16,189
64,829
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UOENO, CA
Excuse me but are you a meme hater? Let me preface this by saying that I've been a memer since they first appeared on 4chan circa 2006 (ages ago in internet time). I remember refreshing /b/ all afternoon with the hope that someone would make a new meme. I was a memer back when Advice Dog was the only one and I still upvote every Advice Dog meme I see becasue of the fond rush of nostalgia it brings me. Nowadays, there are many thousand on livememe and other meme websites. I was a memer back before memegenerator was created (the first meme website) and I had to make them with MS Powerpoint or Paint. Speaking of meme websites, I was one of the first submitters to memebase.com and still have one of the top accounts there despite having migrated to reddit nearly 2 years ago. It was on 4chan and memebase where I cut my teeth creating memes, way before I had a reddit account and way before/r/adviceanimals[1] was created in late 2010. Back before I could get any sort of points or even username recognition, I was creating memes as a clever and easily digestible way to reflect on society, relate some story to my audience, or just be funny. Do you remember rich raven? No? I do. You probably don't remember depression dog, crazy girlfriend praying mantis, introspective pug, or friendzone Johnny either. I remember all of them. In fact, you've never even submitted to /r/adviceanimals[2] . So please, respect my judgement regarding the direction of the subreddit and the integrity of posts I have held dear to my heart for nearly 7 years but you have no strong feelings for.
I'm trying to be as civil as possible amidst a subreddit invasion, the likes of which you are unlikely to have ever seen. We have 43 subscribers subscribers and provocations like this tend to spread to the major griefer subreddits and cause extreme problems that at times, have escalated to reddit admins with discussions with about contacting the FBI due to reddit global denial of service attacks. The unserious attitude of your junior mods isn't helping, and they continue to pelt me with off-topic banter about movies and TV even within the last 20 minutes, a day later. Our own moderators have a policy to conduct all internal discussions on a separate thread from a modmail user complaint, so only specifically relevant, targeted messages reach outside redditors. So I'd appreciate it if your mods would cut me off their discussion thread, now that you have taken action.
I would like you to understand what's going on here. I'm not some young kid drunk on power as a moderator who is flying off the handle. I'm 54 years old and i've been moderating forums since the early 1980's. I have seen it all before. Our subreddit gets a lot of shit, and yes, there are a lot of young, inexperienced, socially maladapted kids who complain about memes. It's our mission to help them and educate them about memes, verticals, and such, to help them adopt more healthy attitudes (about memes specifically). But we can't do that when outside subreddits are intentionally making a hostile environment, where people can't discuss their penguin or duck memes openly or honestly. The post that got attacked by your users was a young kid, trying to find his way in the AdviceAnimals world, and honestly admitting he screwed up. His message was an example for others, to help them avoid similar screwups. These attacks from your subreddit singled him out, which has a chilling effect on other users who now see how hostile the environment can be when someone speaks openly about their memes. So when a user like you singles out an individual for ridicule, and incites other groups like /r/AntiMeme[3] to engage with it, it draws in the most notorious griefers on reddit, like /r/ShitRedditSays[4] and worse. The collateral damage includes attacks on almost all other current threads, which takes days to moderate and calm down. Sometimes it even attracts determined griefers who become permanent problems. IMHO, there is a big difference between posts that deliberately incite trouble in a top 20 subreddit like ours, and poking fun at an obscure subreddit like /r/RandomActsOfBlowJob[5] . Since this has been a repeated problem, and it seems like certain users are constantly scanning /r/AdviceAnimals[6] for material to hate on, I would greatly appreciate if you could look more closely at these posts and in the future, try to understand the meme. Consider this problem might be representative of a bad tendency of yours, provoked by minority bullies that you would like to eliminate just as much as we do.
Thanks.
 

infinity

( o )( o )
May 4, 2005
16,189
64,829
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UOENO, CA
Salutations upon you, my fine collective!
I have recently been introduced to this venue. (Permit me a slight delay, I require a moment to alter the positioning of an eating utensil.) The calling most commonly associated with my physical form is Katy, but you have my permission to refer to me as The Penguin of Doom. (The absurdity of this situation has bolstered my tendency towards jocularity and has resulted in an enthusiastic guffaw.) As should no doubt be evident, my behavior is not governed by any discernible influences or routines.
Such irregularity is the primary basis for my motivation towards joining your numbers. It is my wish to associate myself with entities who possess no predictability in their actions.
It has been approximately five thousand days since my birth, and although such a small measure of time is typically associated with naivety or an insufferable nature, most would agree that my decorum mirrors that of one much older than myself. My favorite pastimes include the viewing of a television show known by the title of "Invader Zim," the content of which I peruse with my girlfriend. (My sexual preferences have been defined via a combination of forces external to myself, and as such, I would appreciate a balanced and appropriate response to the topic.) We delight in media which, in its execution, bears a resemblance to the internal processes which obscure anything but a truly mercurial existence.
Incidentally, the individual to whom I previously referred exhibits similar behavior traits to myself. However, it is my desire to surround myself with an increasing number of like-minded persons. My belief is that an expansive social circle will promote positive emotions.
These are the motivating forces behind my aforementioned desires. It is my hope that you will feel similarly inclined towards platonic connections.
CATASTROPHE!
Fear not, such outbursts are merely my way of solidifying external viewers' impression of my unsystematic conduct. I offer my felicitations, as well as a conceptualized suggestion pertinent to the imagery of a traditional breakfast meal.
Sincerely,
The Penguin of Doom
 

infinity

( o )( o )
May 4, 2005
16,189
64,829
113
38
UOENO, CA
God, I love being a human. Humans are like the best animals. Penguin? More like shitguin. With a shit grin. We have the best grins, the best smiles, because we're so happy. Especially in the West. Being born as a human in the West is like winning the birth lottery. Most of us spend like half of our lives just chilling, eating heaps of food which we can obtain with like zero effort from a large store within a few hundred metres from our homes. How do we afford all of that? We must be working ourselves to death! Nope, we just sit at a desk for a few hours a day, or do some "manual labour" which, thanks to all of that cool technology we have so commonly, is pretty much nothing compared to what other species have to deal with.
God bless humanity: God bless the West, capitalism.