Difference is I felt this way since towards the end of primary school, so I was 8 or 9 when I started having suicidal thoughts.
All these popular kids "boo hoo nobody likes me" then 5 minutes later "hey mum im off to a party with all my friends now". Motherfucker I never even had a friend before in my life. You know what its like to not even know what having friends feels like, having all these thoughts and no one to tell them to so when your not talking to anyone your having more thoughts? And they get deeper and darker... Man I'd murder just to have someone to talk to. Its like being trapped in a fucking cage with no escape. I driven tay off by sending dude too many messages cuz he was one of the first dudes who seemed genuinely cool to me but I dont even know how to socially act man, I feel like Im going fucking crazy man....every 5 minutes I regret what I did 5 minutes ago, I dont want to feel like that man, I just fucking dont man.
