Okay here it is from the horses mouth so to say. First off anyone who knows me personally, not on some internet shit knows that I respect everyone. I ain't known for being no punk and talking shit yadda yadda. I'm a real humble ass dude and more often than not if you met me you would see that. I live my life by God's rules for the most part, meaning yea...I slip up from time to time but so do we all. I didn't choose to be Latino and be from the gang banging mecca of the U.S., that being California. But it's what God chose for me and I love being latino and being from Cali. With that comes alot of responsibility and pressure. Being Latino from Cali everyone wants you to choose one side..your either Northern or Southern PERIOD. This state and our people are devided by that simple decision...Northern or Southern. Like I said I didn't choose to be born here, but here I rest my head and this is the place I love. But, I "REFUSE" to choose a side no matter how it makes other people feel about me and how I live "MY" life..not "YOUR" life...but "MY" life. See, at the end of everyday we all have to look at ourselves in the mirror and be happy with the decisions we make, wether it be the one's we make for our families, our careers or just ourselves.
Think of all the pride you have in being a homeboy/norteno or on the flip side being a sureno..and willing to stay that way till you die because you've lost loved one's over it and vow to ride for it till the end. Now, think of the pride I have inside of me...not PLAYA RAE, but ME....RAY. I am willing to stand up on my own two feet and say, I will not take part in this whole thing and choose a side. I have lost loved one's on BOTH sides and to ME personally it's shown me too much that I am willing to ride for my FREEDOM of just being a Latino from Cali not a Northerner or Southerner. Alot of you can't understand that because you've never known that struggle. It'd be alot easier for me to conform and say I'm choosing "THIS" side and at least have one of you to get behind me and ride for me. But I don't and will NOT except the easy way out, I'm gonna ride this bitch out till the end. And for that decision I get it from BOTH side of Cali. Up here, I am respected by O.G.'s because they know I have never flagged anything in my life and except my life for what it is. But to some, I am still looked at as some sort of sympathizer simply because I can go to L.A., Bakersfield, Delano, San Diego and do shows/handle business & make things happen. Now, on the flip side to that coin, I am still too "bayish" or "nigga like" (maybe it's the Rican in me) to be accepted by everyone in So.Cal. I'm looked at funny cause of my slang, cause of how I dress, my braids (now bald fade), my swagger and the simple fact that I can go to San Jose, San Francisco, the Valley...but to "some" of them...instead of being a sympathizer I am in tern "a mayate", "nortrampa" yadda yadda...just a few that I've heard from that side. But still I am respected by O.G.'s there who are affiliated because they know my path and are koo with it.
Do you get what I am saying? I know a REAL EDUCATED cat reading this can hear me loud and clear and even if he don't type a response he's saying "AMEN BROTHA". I am in a losing battle brothas...for real. All because I am simply a Puerto Rican & Mexican cat who happend to be born in California and raps. I would NEVER disrespect the Northern Homeboys or the Southern Homeboys because at the end of each day, they are my brothers. BUT if you feel that me loving my BLOOD cousin who's from Nor Cal or my BLOOD cousin who is from SO Cal OR...doing a show with one from each side (BIG OSO or LIL ROB) or taking a photo with one from each side is disrespecting you, I don't know what to tell you. That is something I will not change. If we do a show or whatever and we hit it off, I'ma take a flick with that person for my memorabilia..it's something I like to do. Like I said, I can ONLY live MY LIFE...not anybody elses. And if the way I live MY life is bothering you then you need to rethink why your so focused on someone who you don't even know in the 1st place. I've met alot of you on this East Co Co Forum and it's been nothing but hand shakes and smiles. I would never disrespect any of you unless disrespected 1st and even then it would take alot to get me outa line. The one thing that boggles me about some folks tho, is they automatically assume if your not gangbangin your a sucka they can talk shit to and knock on they ass. Trust me, don't take ME for one...that'd be a mistake. We all breathe the same air and leak the same fluid.
I don't know what else to say on this thread...I feel like that's as clear as I can say it. If you still don't agree with it and dislike me, then you will never understand me and for that I am sorry.
- playa rae
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www.playarae.com