in it to win

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Feb 6, 2006
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#4
keeping in mind that its rough it sounds good.. i dont like the beat much but i like the concept of the song and the rhymes weren't bad... id like to hear the final product
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#5
thanx for the feed, well youll get yur wish soon, final product wont be much better in terms of quality, but ill spend more time gettin everything snazzed up, the voice overse will be cleaner, and there will be three full verses. look out for the other track im workin on, "70 bars", i took a free beat off soundclick, shit reminded me of the old school shit where people would bust out cardboard and break dance, lol, so im doin it old school, with no hooks, just 70 bars.
 
Apr 25, 2002
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#6
I'm a lyric man, so you either have to have wicked rhymes, punchlines, or at least a good message.... You got the message thing going in this track. It's not a song where punchlines would apply.... Your actual rhymes could get better.... But the quality of the song isn't bad for a $40 mic. Overall it's probably something I'd listen to when it's done. That's why I said I'm feelin it.
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#7
well im glad yur feelin it, with tracks like these, i go for quotability, so i tried to put alotta deep lines in there that people can quote, such as "they call this the game but it isnt sumthin you can play" believe me, im a lyrics guy as well, youll get to hear some lyrical shit from me pretty soon.
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#10
^^ see thats where i have problems, i have that memmorized, its not even writen down, i cant get it to not seem like i read it. thats prolly the biggest thing holdin me back right now
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#12
im pretty chill , maybe im just naturally monotone, i hope not, i wish there was a way i could just learn how to make it sound better quickly, cause got alotta tracks right now i wanna get done
 
Apr 7, 2005
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#13
thatguy said:
im pretty chill , maybe im just naturally monotone, i hope not, i wish there was a way i could just learn how to make it sound better quickly, cause got alotta tracks right now i wanna get done
no, that's not it.

listen to your verse. there are lines in there that you try and emphasize, but you do it half heartedly. put your twist on it mane. their YOUR words and thoughts, so make them come alive. come from the gut.
 
Mar 26, 2005
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#14
BETO916 said:
no, that's not it.

listen to your verse. there are lines in there that you try and emphasize, but you do it half heartedly. put your twist on it mane. their YOUR words and thoughts, so make them come alive. come from the gut.

that exactly what i was trying to say dog but couldn't find the words. beto worded it beautifully.
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#15
BETO916 said:
no, that's not it.

listen to your verse. there are lines in there that you try and emphasize, but you do it half heartedly. put your twist on it mane. their YOUR words and thoughts, so make them come alive. come from the gut.
maybe its cause i was too lazy to do a voice over on the verse, was the hook ok, i did three voice overs on that, if so, thats my problem
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#16
BETO916 said:
good shit cutty. preactice your flow before you put it down. sounds like you're reading. finish the track mane, I'm diggin' it.
see by this, i prolly took yur comment wrong, but i thought you ment it sounded monotone.
 
Jun 3, 2005
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#17
it aint got shit to do with being monotone. you got no energy and it sounds like you dont even wanna rap. you dont emphasize nothing and that will make listeners lose interest real quick. and you gotta work on your rhymes cuz i lost interest after the 4th bar
 
Apr 8, 2005
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#18
ok, good feed, energy is sumthin i can add,it just seemed weird addin alotta energy to layed back piano beat, ill try and make it work though, emphasising things comes with voice overs, which are not added yet, that can be fixed, and with the rhymes, i dont want people focused on the rhymes, i want them focused on what im tryin to say, thanx for the feedback, much appriciated
 
Apr 25, 2002
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#19
thatguy said:
emphasising things comes with voice overs, which are not added yet
Actually, you're supposed to emphasize in the main vocals. It'll sound ridiculous if you just do voice-overs with emphasis and the main vocal audio has none. It'll be too obvious.

thatguy said:
i dont want people focused on the rhymes, i want them focused on what im tryin to say
The thing about rap is, nobody cares what you have to say if your rhymes aren't appealing enough for them to continue listening. I thought your rhymes were OK, but not good enough for me to want to get a hold of any of your other music. They were just good enough to keep me interested in this particular piece. There are rappers that I think are decent rappers, but I would never buy material from them. See what I'm saying?