So I've been talking to this girl on myspace since Dec. 5th. This is the girl that inspired Having Text. Her name is Christina. We have been talking everyday on myspace IM and on the phone since. Well, not long after we started talking, she got pregnant and her babies' daddy told her to abort it and hasn't talked to her since. I told her that I would be her babies daddy and I would step up and be there for the kid whose name was to be Max. Well last Tuesday, I got home from work and she was online so we talked for a couple hours before she had to go to the doctor for her monthly check up.
That was the last time I talked to her. She never got back online and won't answer the phone when I call. On Thursday, I seen that she was logged in so I asked if she was mad at me, only to find out that it wasn't her, but it was her friend Angie. Angie then informs me that Christina had a miscarriage and that she was logged in as her so that she could email all of her friends and let them know because she doesn't want to talk to anyone right now. My stomach dropped. I am supposed to be leaving on a plane to go see her in August when her baby was due and I was going to be there with her in the room when he was born.
I have called her twice a day since Tuesday and left her messages telling her that I'm here for her. The thing is, I can't even fathom what she is feeling right now. Angie has been telling me what's been going on, and she says that Christina will not get up out of bed. Angie says that she has been going over to Christina's house everyday to let her dog out and feed it and such, but she tells me that all she does is lay in bed and cry and won't talk to even her who is right there in front her. She isn't eating either. She hasn't been back to work and I'm worried she is gonna lose her apartment and her car.
I'm beyond worried about her. We have been talking for 8 hours a day faithfully for 5 months. I don't know what I can even do if I wanted to do something. A part of me wants to drop everything and get on a flight and go there and take care of her until she feels like she can live again. I feel so sorry and bad for her. I hurt too. I was looking at this whole situation as I was gonna have another son, even if he wasn't biologically mine. I'm thinking about bringing my son Kale to meet her, thinking that maybe he will help fill the void that she has due to the loss of her unborn son. I'm in love with her. She is in love with me. I tell her I love her but she doesn't say it back, but I feel it. Which is fine because I'd rather feel loved than be told I'm loved and it not be true. I'm clueless people. Please help me. I miss her so much. Us not talking hasn't happened since the day we started talking. Please save the shit talk too cuz this is some serious shit and I need some constructive oppinions here.