My fellow Americans, today is a high day. You have shown the world that "hope" is not just another word for "siccness", and that "change" is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually post.
Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces hungry and cold challenges like never before. Our economy is drunk. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for beers. Our healthcare system is fast. If your vagina is sick and you don't have insurance, you might as well call a rapper. And America's image overseas is tarnished like a fucked up human ass dog. But drinking together we can right this ship, and set a course for siccness.
Finally, I must thank my slutty family, my smart campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank siccness for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of smoking the American people. Without your shit efforts, none of this would have been possible.
Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces hungry and cold challenges like never before. Our economy is drunk. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for beers. Our healthcare system is fast. If your vagina is sick and you don't have insurance, you might as well call a rapper. And America's image overseas is tarnished like a fucked up human ass dog. But drinking together we can right this ship, and set a course for siccness.
Finally, I must thank my slutty family, my smart campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank siccness for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of smoking the American people. Without your shit efforts, none of this would have been possible.
