freestyle, feedback please

[reppin_the_509]

i did this shit to a beat i had sdtucc in my head, i forget where i heard the beat, but i was hella bored this morning so i started flowin, shit was decent so i wrote it down, and was wondering if yall think it is worth finishing.



just sittin and thinkin, tryin get things to make sence,
wonderin why im always the one left in suspence,
what am i here for, what am i supposed to do,
got a million and 1 dreams, which should i persue,
should a get a strap and bust caps on a dime,
trip over stupid shit and end up doin time,
or should i try to be better, so i can live happily,
bein a bitch in they eyes, would that be such a tragedy,



feedback is apriciated

 

[Jabbz]

keep up with it playa.

 

[Stealth]

nice little free there

 

[reppin_the_509]

^ why thankyou, fuccin school never gave me an english class, and even though i passed the final, my math teacher failed me, so i been in summer school, i get hella bored and just freestyle, here is another one i did


these times got me feelin foresaken, its prolly cause all the dicisions im makin,
but its all got a purpose, none of its in vein, these people done know shit, so fucc what they sayin,
all i need is this money i dream of makin, but hard times are driven me insane,
feel nobody got my back so im always trippin, lookin over my shoulder cause they aint gon catch me slippin,

thanx for the feedback both of you, much appriciated

 

[BETO916]

^^good shit mane...keep comin' thru...next time join the tourney

peace