Zombie vs Ninja is such a powerful piece of cinema that it somehow created a time warp around my living room and made it seem as if the movie took 4 hours to watch. The acting, editing, garbage bag ninja costumes were all terrible. The movie stunk to high heaven, and caused me to regrettably lose an hour and a half of my life. I'll never regain that time back and I am worse off as a human being for viewing the movie.
I picked up a copy of this movie as I love zombie movies and ninja movies. With a title like Zombie vs Ninja, naturally I expected to see combat between zombies and ninjas. I expected this even more so after reading the description on the box which made a statement about the doors of hell being open unleashing a "zombie horde." Wow!
Imagine my horror to discover that this film is actually a composite of 1)a film about an undertaker, who happens to be able to teach his young apprentice kung fu skills, and 2)scenes that appear to have been shot for the only purpose of being inserted into this film to incorporate "ninjas" into the storyline.
A friend of mine and I went on a mission to find the worse movie of all time. After we watched this movie, we did not even bother to put in the other movies we rented.
Half of this movie is an actual (probably terrible) Hong Kong kung-fu flick, the rest is comprised of footage that looks like it was shot somewhere in Utah with costumes that came from the dollar store. Did I mention all of this footage is shot on a consumer level VHS camcorder? The white Caucasion ninjas are, as others have pointed out, literally dressed in garbage bags, and not good ones either. The best is when characters from the Hong Kong film are cut to look as if they're interacting with the Caucasions. The reaction shots are priceless.
First, let me state that I have seen much worse movies (Hercules in New York jumps to mind) ... after all, this was a ninja movie and it had some good fighting in it. Having said that, I can't help but wonder what the hell they were thinking? Why was the ninjas dressed up with bright yellow suits and headbands saying "NINJA"?
The very best bit in the movie is a line of dialogue from the zombie segment in which the zombie master decides to reanimate a corpse to test Ethan's developing combative prowess. The necromancer makes the excuse that he needs to defecate and goes and crouches in a ditch where he begins his magical incantations. However, unbeknown to him, Ethan spies him squatting down making what appear to be exaggerated 'straining' noises and subsequently utters what has to be one of the most hilarious lines in movie history! If you've ever seen this film then I'm sure you'll remember the line as it's not likely that once heard you'll ever forget it!
