ENJOY......
1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John
>>Walter
>>
>>after nine months, saying he
>>
>>lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance
>>
>>package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.
>>
>>
>>
>>2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland,
>>California
>>
>>spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded
>>himself inside his home. After firing ten tear
>>
>>gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was
>>
>>standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out
>>and
>>
>>give yourself up."
>>
>>
>>
>>3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun,
>>
>>kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two
>>
>>different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper
>>proceeded to
>>
>>withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
>>
>>
>>
>>4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and
>>asked
>>
>>for all the money in the cash drawer.
>>
>>Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk
>>and
>>
>>worked the counter himself for three hours until police
>>
>>showed up and grabbed him.
>>
>>
>>
>>5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a
>>robbery
>>
>>Suspect who just couldn't control himself during
>>
>>a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat
>>the
>>
>>words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man
>>
>>shouted, "That's not what I said!"
>>
>>
>>
>>6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into the phone,
>>"My
>>
>>wife is pregnant and her contractions are
>>
>>only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor
>>asked.
>>
>>"No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"
>>
>>
>>
>>7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California,
>>Steven
>>
>>Richard King was arrested for trying to
>>
>>hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a
>>thumb and
>>
>>a finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he
>>
>>failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
>>
>>
>>
>>(hellllllooooooo!)
>>
>>
>>
>>8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!) Last summer, down on Lake
>>
>>Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour
>>
>>east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were
>>having
>>
>>a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they
>>
>>couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. boat going. It was very
>>sluggish in
>>
>>almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was
>>
>>applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted
>>to a
>>
>>nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them
>>
>>what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in
>>perfect
>>
>>working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive
>>
>>went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So,
>>one
>>
>>of the marina guys jumped in the water to check
>>
>>underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.
>>NOW
>>
>>REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE ... Under the
>>
>>boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.
>>
>>
>>
>>Does any one else find it frightening the majority of these took
>>place
>>
>>in California??
1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John
>>Walter
>>
>>after nine months, saying he
>>
>>lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance
>>
>>package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.
>>
>>
>>
>>2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland,
>>California
>>
>>spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded
>>himself inside his home. After firing ten tear
>>
>>gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was
>>
>>standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out
>>and
>>
>>give yourself up."
>>
>>
>>
>>3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun,
>>
>>kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two
>>
>>different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper
>>proceeded to
>>
>>withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
>>
>>
>>
>>4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and
>>asked
>>
>>for all the money in the cash drawer.
>>
>>Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk
>>and
>>
>>worked the counter himself for three hours until police
>>
>>showed up and grabbed him.
>>
>>
>>
>>5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a
>>robbery
>>
>>Suspect who just couldn't control himself during
>>
>>a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat
>>the
>>
>>words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man
>>
>>shouted, "That's not what I said!"
>>
>>
>>
>>6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into the phone,
>>"My
>>
>>wife is pregnant and her contractions are
>>
>>only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor
>>asked.
>>
>>"No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"
>>
>>
>>
>>7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California,
>>Steven
>>
>>Richard King was arrested for trying to
>>
>>hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a
>>thumb and
>>
>>a finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he
>>
>>failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
>>
>>
>>
>>(hellllllooooooo!)
>>
>>
>>
>>8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!) Last summer, down on Lake
>>
>>Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour
>>
>>east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were
>>having
>>
>>a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they
>>
>>couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. boat going. It was very
>>sluggish in
>>
>>almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was
>>
>>applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted
>>to a
>>
>>nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them
>>
>>what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in
>>perfect
>>
>>working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive
>>
>>went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So,
>>one
>>
>>of the marina guys jumped in the water to check
>>
>>underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.
>>NOW
>>
>>REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE ... Under the
>>
>>boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.
>>
>>
>>
>>Does any one else find it frightening the majority of these took
>>place
>>
>>in California??
