Something FUCKED UP happened to me in the bathroom today.

[MeloTrauma]

I had the worse diarreah today at school. I gotta stop eatin all that Raisin Bran in the morning.

Anyway, I did what I always said I wouldnt do... I took a shit at school. I had that lower abdominal cramp that you get with the runs, and that shit was killing me!!!

So before class I found a desolate bathroom and laid down one of those seat covers on the toilet. Ahhh the relieving propulsion of my diarreah was so fucking soothing. I was able to breathe easy... UNTIL

I went to go wipe my ass, and guess what... NO TOILET PAPER. I waddle to the next stall with my shitty ass hangin out and once again NO TOILET PAPER. The third and final stall, still no TP.

At that point I figured I could use the paper handtowels. Well them bitches were OUT too.

So I did what I had to do... I USED THE TOILETSEAT COVERS TO WIPE MY DIARREAH ASS.

FUCK PUBLIC BATHROOMS!!!

 

[P-Nut]

if you went that far you might as well went to the ladies room.

 

[Cranky]

When all else fails..........use your socks.........LMAO......

 

[Locahontas]

LMAAAAAAAAOOOOOO!!! I'm so sorry...

 

[Smitty]

We're going to start calling you Shitbreak, like Finch in American Pie.

 

[m.w.merlino]

lol...i had to take a shit at school once....during testing too shit was gay....missed hella of the test cuz of sum fucked up diarhea..i feel your pain

 

[WcMalice]

When all else fails..........use your socks.........LMAO......

shit.......thats what I would do, at least your shit would get wiped properly like that......just remember to not put the socks back on

 

[ordekoms]

reading your story brought to thought a story of my own, i believe i was in...10th grade, an this kid had brought these little blue exlax pills to school, so we were fuckin wit this kid an acted like we took a whole bunch of them(he had NO idea what kinda pills they were), long story short we got the kid to take about 7 of them an about 1 or 2 hours later i was walkin down the hall only to come across the kid we gave the pill too walkin wit his mom to go home. i was rollin all day just laughing at random times when i think about it, he never admitted thas why he went home he jus made up a bullshit story.

 

[PoetiCCC]

^^^^thats fuccin nuts.....



i had to take a shit before in school....only once......but one good question is why is it always a diarrhea shit ya know....why cant it be like a regular shit just have to shit real real bad shit......

 

[UKantCMe]

We're going to start calling you Shitbreak, like Finch in American Pie.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

 

[bigbreaded]

Stop drinking milk.

 

[TONY206]

lol...i had to take a shit at school once....during testing too shit was gay....missed hella of the test cuz of sum fucked up diarhea..i feel your pain

haha that happened to me too

 

[ZattyMi(Blight)]

Funny stories. LMAO

I remember a dood in my grade had diareaha and the same thing happened so he used his shirt. He had to go to the office cause he wasnt wearing a shirt, so then he told everyone the REAL reason why. I would have said my shirt got ripped or something, not that he used to to wipe his ass, lol.

 

[Unregistered]

Damn, all you're doing is disposing of the un-necessary, so what's the big deal about taking a shit at school?
Next time just make sure there's toilet paper in the dispenser.

 

[micwu]

not a shit story like yall talkin about but it is a shit story an it did happen at school.........me an my boy Adam had summer school my Jr. year an it was durning class when we went walking around b/c we told these girls we'd meet them during class by the bathrooms at a set time.so we walk over there to meet the girls whatever an they told us to follow them into the bathroom.being that there girls they chose the girls bathroom. but me an Adam werent trippin off what bathroom they picked cuz we was about to get into a lil action ya feel? so we're in the bathroom with these girls when the door starts to open. so me an Adam jump into one of the empty stalls. im on top of the toilet an Adam standing in front of me so that we dont draw to much attention.but why that bitch gotta pick the stall next to us?an to make things worse this bitch is coppin a squat. i mean there must have been 3 plops.you know the plop sound when you takin a shit.we couldnt hold in the laughter trust me we tried.but to make a long story short we thought best to run before being identified by the pooper. so we ran out side an waited on teh benchs to see who the pooper was (we jus had to see you guys would do the same im sure)an met the girls later after class......

 

[Locahontas]

lol @ being identified by the 'pooper'!!!

I shit at work all the time. It's like my body's on a schedule. I never have to go until around 8:15 am when I'm at work. WTF? But my son's dad would shit ANYWHERE! Seriously...AppleBee's in Manhattan, Olive Garden, Pizza Hut, the mall, my job, the gym, the bar...wherever. I remember one time he took a shit at the bar (the bathrooms were soooo nasty!), & I opened the door to peek at him & he was standing (almost straight up!) over the toilet taking a shit! It was hilarious! But I don't blame him, you could cover that toilet seat with two rolls of toilet paper, & I still wouldn't put my ass within a foot of it!!! All I heard was, "Close the door Amber! I hear you laughin!" It was funny as hell.

 

[Locahontas]

I got another shit story about my baby's dad! We went to NYC for New Year's this year. I took him to my cousin's house in Queens so they could meet. On our way there, he was sayin how bad he had to shit & he knew he never should've eaten those candy coated cashews. (now, dude just took a shit at Applebee's right before all this) I'm driving as fast as I can & he had to open the sun roof cuzz he kept fartin! He told me I should probably pull over. But I didn't cuzz he takes forever to shit & it was cold outside! We get to my cousin's house & he heads straight for the bathroom (the one that always gets clogged up when you shit in it). I kid you not, he was in there for 50 minutes! Me & my cousin were crackin up. All you could hear was the toilet flush, the plunger tryna unclog the toilet, & the air freshener being sprayed over & over! While he was in there, I opened the door to check on him. He has taken off his shirt & was sweatin like hell! I guess I can be grateful that we weren't on the turnpike on our way home when all this happened. I have never known anybody who would shit like that. It was like, as soon as he ate somethin, it would come out his ass. It's like the inside of his body just had a tube that went from his mouth straight to his ass!

 

[Bigga Don Jah]

rofl funny ass shit but u should have use your socks to wipe yo ass up man thats why I would've dunn lmao

 

[lunitunez]

me and a couple of friends just got back from the bars and were kickin it at my boys house, this one female has to use the facilities real quick so she walks over to the bathroom door and opens it, starts fucking screaming and is like "theres a guy here passed out in the bathroom!". so we all walk over to discover this other guy i know naked passed out on the toliet, must have passed out right after he took a shit cause it was stank as fuck up in there and also there was a white t-shirt in the trash with a shit smear on it since those muthafuckas choose to always buy TP last minute. classic shit.
and on an unrelated note another time I had slept over at the same place one night, this one female must have gotten up before everyone else and walked by the same guys bedroom, she woke us all up and told us to look, we stroll over and peep the scene, hes once again naked on his bed with no covers with his hand on his nuts and some morning wood. off the wall shit

 

[Locahontas]

My baby's dad used to fall asleep butt naked on the toilet when he was drunk. But he would usually just get naked & sleep on the bathroom floor (since it was cold) with his head on a box of baby wipes!