GEORGE W. BUSH RESUME
The White House, USA
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I attacked and took over two countries.
I spent the U.S. surplus and bankrupted the Treasury.
I shattered the record for biggest annual deficit in history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any
12-month period.
I set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock
market.
I am the first president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
I am the first president in US history to enter office with a criminal
record.
In my first year in office I set the all-time record for most days on
vacation by any president in US history.
After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, I presided
over the worst security failure in US history.
I set the record for most campaign fund raising trips by any president
in US history.
In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their
job.
I cut unemployment benefits for more out-of-work Americans than any
other president in US history.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than
any president in US history.
I set the record for the fewest press conferences of any president
since
the advent of TV.
I signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than
any other president in US history.
I presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to
intervene when corruption was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused
to
use the national reserves as past presidents have.
I cut health care benefits for war veterans.
I set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously
take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the
record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
I dissolved more international treaties than any president in US
history.
I've made my presidency the most secretive and unaccountable of any in
US history.
Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in US
history. (The 'poorest' multimillionaire, Condoleeza Rice, has a
Chevron oil tanker named after her).
I am the first president in US history to have all 50 states of the
Union simultaneously go bankrupt.
I presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud in any market
in any country in the history of the world.
I am the first president in US history to order a US attack and
military
occupation of a sovereign nation, and I did so against the will of the
United Nations and the world community.
I have created the largest government department bureaucracy in the
history of the United States.
I set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases,
more than any other president in US history.
I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations
remove
the US from the Human Rights Commission.
I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations
remove
the US from the Elections Monitoring Board.
I removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of
congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US
history.
I rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
I withdrew from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by
default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
I am the first president in US history to refuse United Nations
election
inspectors access during the 2002 US elections.
I am the all-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate
campaign donations.
The biggest lifetime contributor to my campaign, who is also one of my
best friends, presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds
in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation). I spent
more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US history.
I am the first president to run and hide when the US came under attack
(and then lied,saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
I am the first US president to establish a secret shadow government.
I took the world's sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a
year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the
biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).
I am the first US president in history to have a majority of the people
of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace
and stability.
I am the first US president in history to have the people of South
Korea
more threatened by the US than by their immediate neighbor, North
Korea.
I changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded
government contracts.
I set the all-time record for number of administration appointees who
violated US law by not selling their huge investments in corporations
bidding for gov't contracts.
I have removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any
other president in US history. In a little over two years I have
created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided
that
the US has been since the civil war.
I entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less
than two years turned every single economic category heading straight
down.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
I have at least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas
driving
record has been erased and is not available).
I was AWOL from the National Guard and deserted the military during a
time
of war. I refuse to take a drug test or even answer any questions about
drug use.
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away
to
my fathers library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or
bankrupt
companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All minutes of meetings of any public corporation for which I served on
the board are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding
public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public
review.
PERSONAL REFERENCES:
For personal references, please speak to my dad or uncle James Baker
(They can be reached in their offices at the Carlyle Group where they are
helping to divide up the spoils of the US-Iraq war and plan for the next
one.)
The White House, USA
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I attacked and took over two countries.
I spent the U.S. surplus and bankrupted the Treasury.
I shattered the record for biggest annual deficit in history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any
12-month period.
I set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock
market.
I am the first president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
I am the first president in US history to enter office with a criminal
record.
In my first year in office I set the all-time record for most days on
vacation by any president in US history.
After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, I presided
over the worst security failure in US history.
I set the record for most campaign fund raising trips by any president
in US history.
In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their
job.
I cut unemployment benefits for more out-of-work Americans than any
other president in US history.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than
any president in US history.
I set the record for the fewest press conferences of any president
since
the advent of TV.
I signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than
any other president in US history.
I presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to
intervene when corruption was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused
to
use the national reserves as past presidents have.
I cut health care benefits for war veterans.
I set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously
take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the
record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
I dissolved more international treaties than any president in US
history.
I've made my presidency the most secretive and unaccountable of any in
US history.
Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in US
history. (The 'poorest' multimillionaire, Condoleeza Rice, has a
Chevron oil tanker named after her).
I am the first president in US history to have all 50 states of the
Union simultaneously go bankrupt.
I presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud in any market
in any country in the history of the world.
I am the first president in US history to order a US attack and
military
occupation of a sovereign nation, and I did so against the will of the
United Nations and the world community.
I have created the largest government department bureaucracy in the
history of the United States.
I set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases,
more than any other president in US history.
I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations
remove
the US from the Human Rights Commission.
I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations
remove
the US from the Elections Monitoring Board.
I removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of
congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US
history.
I rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
I withdrew from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by
default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
I am the first president in US history to refuse United Nations
election
inspectors access during the 2002 US elections.
I am the all-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate
campaign donations.
The biggest lifetime contributor to my campaign, who is also one of my
best friends, presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds
in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation). I spent
more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US history.
I am the first president to run and hide when the US came under attack
(and then lied,saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
I am the first US president to establish a secret shadow government.
I took the world's sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a
year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the
biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).
I am the first US president in history to have a majority of the people
of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace
and stability.
I am the first US president in history to have the people of South
Korea
more threatened by the US than by their immediate neighbor, North
Korea.
I changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded
government contracts.
I set the all-time record for number of administration appointees who
violated US law by not selling their huge investments in corporations
bidding for gov't contracts.
I have removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any
other president in US history. In a little over two years I have
created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided
that
the US has been since the civil war.
I entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less
than two years turned every single economic category heading straight
down.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
I have at least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas
driving
record has been erased and is not available).
I was AWOL from the National Guard and deserted the military during a
time
of war. I refuse to take a drug test or even answer any questions about
drug use.
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away
to
my fathers library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or
bankrupt
companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All minutes of meetings of any public corporation for which I served on
the board are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding
public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public
review.
PERSONAL REFERENCES:
For personal references, please speak to my dad or uncle James Baker
(They can be reached in their offices at the Carlyle Group where they are
helping to divide up the spoils of the US-Iraq war and plan for the next
one.)
