*PEEP* MY GIFT FROM GOD[undecided]

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C

CEL-C-US 420

Guest
#1
#1

I’m going to confess
Pen pressed
Ink flee's smudged on dead treez (paper)
Mal nutrition-no love-wont budge
Fiend fo sticky leafs
Compressed-fuse grows less-self combust
Filled with stress
Salt Lake-chronic is scarce-maybe instinct
Conversations with my inner shrink
Rezort to Newport’s
To reserve my nerves
Jurisdictions- a slave to my addiction
Substances fighting-its computation
(pay attention!!!) what I say is deep
(more than the obvious)hidden meaning lie beneath
(the surface)
stereo types-pressure bust pipes-rotted with rezent
never regret it
billion rhymes thought-only a chosen few selected
filtered /strained only the purest game leaves my brain


FEED BACK WOULD BE GOOD-PEACE
 
C

CEL-C-US 420

Guest
#12
#12

@ Tank I made my lines short on purpose,I was trying to use the least amount of words,to descibe complex & deep feelings-this is one concept of poetry....thax for the feedback yall-peace
 
A

All Out HOGG

Guest
#13
#13

Im feeling the description part of this...some things...i think you just don't understand how to express things so others can understand [not a bad thing]
 
C

Cel-c-us

Sicc OG
#16
Jul 25, 2002
718
0
0
40
www.raptalk.net
#16
origanally posted by stealth on http://www.illstylez.com/board/showthread.php?s=&postid=15389#post15389
"You fucking suck. You are a terrible MC. Nobody likes your shit. It has no creativity or talent. REAL TALK."

I want Stealth's feed back on my verse, Back up your REAL TALK by posting the real.
 
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