Tech N9ne attacked by Kiwi
While touring New Zealand, Tech N9ne has reportedly been attacked by a wild pack of rabid kiwi. After exiting his touring van to remove some dead weight (and manager) Travis O'Guin, it seems that they were made to wait while Tech relieved himself on the side of the road. After minutes had passed by without any word from Tech, it was assumed by his friends and co-workers that he was either masterbating or "couldn't get it workin", as told to us by Mr. O'Guin. After roughly ten minutes had passed, Tech returned to the then baked out van bleeding, with bruises about his arms and face.
Tech claims after relieving himself on a Kiwi, the cute cuddly and small birds indigenous to that area, a flock embarked on him and proceeded to peck at his ankles untill he was taken to the floor. "The mothafuckas went all ukelele on my mothafuckin' ukeleles." he stated to the local authorities. Not much more is known at this time, but myself and Techn9nehq.com will keep you posted on this horrific event.
