my last lyrics

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Jul 21, 2002
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#1
yeah, i know. i said no more threads from me, but here is the last song i will probably ever write, i was gonna get into the studio with this one but i had made my decision about life a week or so later, but check it out anyways, leave feedback if you want, good or bad

YOUR GAME'S FULL OF SALT,
SO HALT YOUR ASSAULT,
OR I'LL INSTALL, AND 8 FOOT STICK IN YO EYE,
AND POLE VAULT FROM IT/
I SET THE NEW RECORD,
CLEARED 12 FEET,
Y'ALL GONE RUNNIN,
THAT'S 6 PEEPS, WITH 2 FEET EACH
I JUST WATCHED YA JAWS PLUMMET/
I'LL DISOLVE YA GALL BLADDER,
PAINT YA WALLS WITH BRAIN MATTER,
I REMAIN THE MAIN FACTOR,
THIS AIN'T THE SAME RAPPER/
I INFLICT PAIN FASTER,
THAN YOU CAN SAY HUSSEIN BACKWARDS,
WATCH YOUR GUTS SPLIT SPLATTER,
I GOT THIS MURDER THANG MASTERED/
YOU GET THE GIST CROSS YOUR NAME OFF THE LIST,
WHAT JUST HAPPENED?,
YOU LOST ALL YOUR THOUGHTS
AND JUST SHIT YA GRAY KHAKIS/
I AIN'T KNOWN,
BUT I'LL SMACK NORAH JONES,
AND TAKE HOME HER 8 GRAMMY'S,
MY FATHER IS NOT OZZY,
BUT I CAME FROM AN INSANE FAMILY/
I GOT CRAZY IN MY VEINS
LIKE LAID FACE DOWN ON A CO-CAINE MATTRESS,
Y'ALL CLAIMIN TO BE GANGSTAS
BUT YOU AIN'T EVEN GOOD ACTRESSES/
I JUST CREATED SHIT,
GOOD ENOUGH TO BE THE NEXT PLATINUM HIT,
ALL I NEED IS TO BE SEEN BY AFTERMATH'S MANAGEMENT/
NOT SINCE MARSHALL MATHERS,
HAS THERE BEEN A SEED THAT'S THIS DASTARDLY,
TO THE MUSIC BUISNESS,
I'M WORSE THAN CURSE OF HURT SERVED BY NAPSTER/
I DESERVE, A CERTIFIED PLAQUE FOR MY ACTIONS,
I THINK I EARNED IT,
WHEN I TURNED EVERY MIC TO BURNED ASHES/
I'M PREFERRED OVER 30 TO 1 OVER THE LAME RAPPERS,
THEY CONCERNED CAUSE THEIR FANS,
ALL RETURNED THEIR LAST MASTERPIECE/
LIKE A JACKHAMMER,
YOU HEAR ME OUT ON THE STREETS CRACKIN,
LIKE A FAT KID, STEPPED ON THIN ICE,
IT'S A BAD ACCIDENT/
IT WASN'T IN THE PLAN FOR MY VOICE TO BE BROADCASTED,
ON THE RADIO, UNITED STATES WIDE,
A DISASTER'S HIT/
THE BLUEPRINTS ALL BEEN LAID OUT,
AND GOD DRAFTED IT,
HE SAID I COULD SIT ON THIS THRONE,
CAUSE I HAND CRAFTED IT////

THE SONG WASN'T DONE, JUST SOME LYRICS. STEAL THE LYRICS IF YOU WANT EM', IT AIN'T FOR ME ANYMORE. LATE
 
A

All Out HOGG

Guest
#2
Didn't realy feel it except for one line...

'I'LL DISOLVE YA GALL BLADDER,
PAINT YA WALLS WITH BRAIN MATTER,"

The rest wasn't my taiste
 
Jun 9, 2002
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#5
"Packin' burning big beam bullets when I bubble ready to blast, the beat tear shit up like a brittle beast breathing breath fast, break bones when I bone a hoe, workin' the bitch out like tye-bo, and the same time spitin' a sick ass flow"--4t7



now that line is horrible...
 
Jan 25, 2003
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#9
CHRISHOGG14 said:
I'LL DISOLVE YA GALL BLADDER,
PAINT YA WALLS WITH BRAIN MATTER,

Y'ALL CLAIMIN TO BE GANGSTAS
BUT YOU AIN'T EVEN GOOD ACTRESSES/


THE BLUEPRINTS ALL BEEN LAID OUT,
AND GOD DRAFTED IT,
HE SAID I COULD SIT ON THIS THRONE,
CAUSE I HAND CRAFTED IT////
i know me and you have had problems and youre still not a norte but i was diggin these lines
 
Jun 12, 2002
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#13
CHRISHOGG14 said:
eh deuce, here was the "last" thing i have posted lately as far as raps go.

I'm lost cuzzo..lol.....

Originally posted by CHRISHOGG14
agreed^^^^^^^

and which lines are so horrible?
I'm not knowin' who your typin' too maine....


ANYWAY,The verdict is this,These bars need Cerious extensions to maybe 8-12 words,Better Structure would make it more enjoyable to read,This most definatly ain't commericalized language comin' from me cuzzo,this is Real,It look's somewhat disfigured or something at first glance,Average is what Deuce will class it as,Not poor,Not weak,But take it and scribe some extra word's onto each bar and hit this post bacc.

And uh Chris...I see you got a fan club Reachin' 5 responses long on this thread...lol....Don't sweat em' loc I been arund this mothafucca for a minute now and these fag's speak on tight rhymes and elevation ....lol...TRruth be told I seen Tampon wing's fly higher...Although your shit wasen't Pretty,It still doesn't sanction these fucccin' candy canes to speak out of turn.

This is a generous 4 1/2/10 Documentation.


Deuce Loc 1

Couple C'zzzz





:angry:
 
Jul 21, 2002
8,158
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42
Oklahoma
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#14
aye deuce. thanks for spittin the real once again. to get a feel of how that shit is suppsed to be spit, it's similar to eminem's lose yourself or way i am. i wasn't tryin to bite his shit, it's just the way it came out. that's why the lines ain't like 10 words deep. there is alot of stress on particular vowel sounds and shit. it draws the word out longer than normal, personally, i think it sounded good and really, i don't jock myself. i am a pretty modest dude.

as far as this being my last, I have given up rap. I made the decision to devote my heart to God, and i felt that such negative lyricism conflicted with my goal of becoming a better Christian you dig? i try not to post on here hardly at all anymore for that reason too, cause when i see these extra friendly style charmin soft ass rappers, it makes me wanna rip em up. but i refrain and keep my mouth shut. stay up and do what you do eNe.
 
Jul 21, 2002
8,158
665
0
42
Oklahoma
www.youtube.com
#16
to have made a statement like that, you had to have been around long enough to have read other raps from me, give it up redtownhomo, you aren't fooling anyone. no matter how hard you try, no matter what name you use, i can see right through it. face it, you are such a suckelle that it shines through regardless of what name you use.
 
Feb 21, 2003
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#17
CHRISHOGG14 said:
to have made a statement like that, you had to have been around long enough to have read other raps from me, give it up redtownhomo, you aren't fooling anyone. no matter how hard you try, no matter what name you use, i can see right through it. face it, you are such a suckelle that it shines through regardless of what name you use.
ACTUALLY, IVE NEVER SEEN ANY OF UR OTHER RAPZ...I JUS SAID THAT TO BE A DICK ABOUT THE WHOLE THING....

MAYBE U WANNA POST UP UR OLD RAPZ OR SOMETHING?

INSTEAD OF COMIN OFF LIKE A HURT FEMALE CRYIN BOUT SOME INTERNET SHIT, HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR

AND ANOTHER THING...DONT COME AT ME ACCUSING ME OF BEING SOMEONE ELSE AND CALLIN OUT NAMES....THATZ HOW U GET SLAPPED BY A RILLA