ENJOY.........................................
LITTLE BILLY ON GETTING OLDER
Little BILLY was sitting on a park bench munching on one
candy bar after another. After the 6th one, a man on the bench
across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't
good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you
fat."
Little BILLY replied, "My grandfather lived to be
107 years old."
"Oh?" replied the man. " Did your grandfather eat 6 candy
bars at a time?"
"No" replied Little BILLY, "he minded his own
fucking business!!"
********
LITTLE BILLY ON PHILOSOPHY
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on
a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be
left?" She calls on little BILLY.
He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like
your thinking."
Then little BILLY says, "I have a question for YOU. There are
3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is
delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The
second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third
is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well,
I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the
cone."
To which Little BILLY replied," The correct answer is 'the
one with the wedding ring on, but I like your thinking."
*********
LITTLE BILLY ON MATH:
Little BILLY returns home from school and says he got an F
in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father."
"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3?' I said
6," replied BILLY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me, 'How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the fucking difference? " asks the father.
"That's what I said!"
************
LITTLE BILLY ON ENGLISH:
Little BILLY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today
we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody
have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
BILLY says " Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little BILLY, that's
a mouthful."
Little BILLY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of
a blowjob."
********
LITTLE BILLY ON GRAMMAR:
Little BILLY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden,
he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out," Miss Jones, I
need to take a piss!!"
Miss Jones replied, "Now, BILLY, that is NOT the proper word
to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use
is 'urinate'. Please use the word 'urinate' in a sentence
correctly and I will allow you to go."
Little BILLY thinks for a bit, then says, "You're an eight,
but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"
********
LITTLE BILLY ON GRAMMAR:
The teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could
use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First she called on little Suzie, who responded
with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she
looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called
on little Michael. "My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and
it turned out beautifully."
The teacher responded, "Excellent, Michael!" Then,
she reluctantly called on little BILLY.
"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father
that she was pregnant, and he said "Beautiful, just
fucking beautiful!"
LITTLE BILLY ON GETTING OLDER
Little BILLY was sitting on a park bench munching on one
candy bar after another. After the 6th one, a man on the bench
across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't
good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you
fat."
Little BILLY replied, "My grandfather lived to be
107 years old."
"Oh?" replied the man. " Did your grandfather eat 6 candy
bars at a time?"
"No" replied Little BILLY, "he minded his own
fucking business!!"
********
LITTLE BILLY ON PHILOSOPHY
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on
a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be
left?" She calls on little BILLY.
He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like
your thinking."
Then little BILLY says, "I have a question for YOU. There are
3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is
delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The
second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third
is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well,
I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the
cone."
To which Little BILLY replied," The correct answer is 'the
one with the wedding ring on, but I like your thinking."
*********
LITTLE BILLY ON MATH:
Little BILLY returns home from school and says he got an F
in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father."
"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3?' I said
6," replied BILLY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me, 'How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the fucking difference? " asks the father.
"That's what I said!"
************
LITTLE BILLY ON ENGLISH:
Little BILLY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today
we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody
have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
BILLY says " Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little BILLY, that's
a mouthful."
Little BILLY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of
a blowjob."
********
LITTLE BILLY ON GRAMMAR:
Little BILLY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden,
he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out," Miss Jones, I
need to take a piss!!"
Miss Jones replied, "Now, BILLY, that is NOT the proper word
to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use
is 'urinate'. Please use the word 'urinate' in a sentence
correctly and I will allow you to go."
Little BILLY thinks for a bit, then says, "You're an eight,
but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"
********
LITTLE BILLY ON GRAMMAR:
The teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could
use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First she called on little Suzie, who responded
with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she
looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called
on little Michael. "My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and
it turned out beautifully."
The teacher responded, "Excellent, Michael!" Then,
she reluctantly called on little BILLY.
"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father
that she was pregnant, and he said "Beautiful, just
fucking beautiful!"
