KERRYS JOB APPLICATION!!!!

[High Caliber Ent.]

A PORTION OF KERRY'S ACTUALY JOB APPLICATION:

_____________________________________________________________

COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since. I have no real world experience except that of a gigolo, by marrying rich women and running HJ Heinz vicariously through my wife Teresa.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
As a US Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. I have consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting against budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself. Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit that I voted for it. I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes significantly if I am elected.

My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George Bush, that he will never catch up. I make no or little charitable contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in MA, despite family wealth in excess of $700 million.

I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although blame George Bush for sending all of the jobs out of Country.

Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
None.

PERSONAL
I ride a Serotta Bike.

My Gulfstream V Jet I call The Flying Squirrel.

I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the "Scarmouche."

I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our real culture.

I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large polluting inefficient vehicles and blame George Bush for the energy problems.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE

JOHN F. KERRY

 

[nefar559]

now try to get nader's application

 

[WHITE DEVIL]

Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A

Bush got in through connections and the point system.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since.

And this is a disadvantage? He's been a congressman for a long time? OH MY.

As a US Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting record,

Should read "I set the record for most liberal voting record in 2003."

I have consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting against budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself.

Bush administration: Intelligence screwups are the CIA's fault. The CIA and intelligence community are untrustworthy in their assessments. Not because they were underfunded, because they had fundamental, structural problems. Bush's enemy is now Kerry's enemy.
And how the fuck would a bigger military budget protect the country. WHAT THE FUCK HAS OUR ARMY PROTECTED THE US FROM IN THE PAST 50 YEARS? Nothing. Not a fucking thing!

I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes significantly if I am elected.

So liberal instantly means bad. Innnnteresting....you've convinced me! And Kerry has no plan for the country? So if elected Kerry will just "shoot from the hip" and come up with shit on weekends over a BBQ? What, will he get his ideas from people in front of Starbucks?

I make no or little charitable contributions

In other words, the people who wrote this have no idea what contributions Kerry has made, except those he has made public.

I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although blame George Bush for sending all of the jobs out of Country.

So Arco, Shell, Koch, Exxon-Valdez, BP, and Bush's other major contributors own no overseas plants or operations? As a matter of fact, the Bush connection with the Saudis means nothing?
George Bush's flip-flops about how he would deal with OPEC mean nothing?

I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our real culture.

What the fuck is this guy thinking? We all know COUNTRY MUSIC reflects real American culture.

blame Bush for the energy problems

Antonio, or dumbass, do you know anything about Bush's energy policies? Do you know one fucking thing about them? Mental midget ass mothafucka.

 

[WHITE DEVIL]

 

[High Caliber Ent.]

hahaha those were great....