Saturday nite.
That was SUCH fuckin bullshit negative karma. How does shit like this happen? I thought maybe, just fukkin MAYBE, I could make a run to the adult bookstore and pick up some condoms for the weekend and a 50 dollar blow-up doll just in case I don't score a chick at the club. So I fuckin drive way out on Watt and wear a baseball cap and shades to sort of disguise myself since I'm a little fuckin embarrassed about walking into those places.
There's a Goldie's on Del Paso but I never go to that one in fear of someone I know driving past it and calling me out. So I went to the one way out in North Higlands.
I quickly go into the store and there's all sorts of shady people in there, including a lesbian fat couple who were looking at porn videos. I grabbed a cheap 10 dollar porn flick and then a box with a HOT looking blow-up doll and I also got a pack of condoms.
When you go into these places you have to sort of hit a zone where you're not embarrassed. I had fuckin tunnell vision going on and felt confident as I made my purchase. I walked out of the store and looked both ways. Slipped my shades on and crept to my rig and started the engine.
Fuckin car would NOT start.
Could it be a dead battery? NO. that would have been to easy. I could have jump started it at least. Anyway, I checked the engine and everything and I think it's the FUCKIN transmission. This is so unfair! WHY does it happen?
I was red as a beet and stuffed my purchases in my truck under a blanket. I panicked since I was in a bad area of town, and thought about calling my brother. But of course I didn't - that would have sucked. I thought about calling a tow truck but then that asshole would have run masturbation smack on me as we rode back to Westgate. I shivered and glanced around in panic with Tom Green wide-eyes.
SO I said fuck this, and WALKED 15 miles back home. On the way back I stopped at Subway, refusing to have my day ruined, and ate a sub while trying to not fret about my rig. I called up a co-worker Sunday night and told him my car was in the shop and that I needed a ride, so dude picked me up yesterday morning and also gave me a ride to Denny's late that afternoon for brunch. He's driving me home today and from there I'll figure out what I am going to do about my rig that's broken down in the parking lot of a damn adult bookstore. By the way, I took the condoms home but left the porno and blow-up doll in the trunk.
D-Money
That was SUCH fuckin bullshit negative karma. How does shit like this happen? I thought maybe, just fukkin MAYBE, I could make a run to the adult bookstore and pick up some condoms for the weekend and a 50 dollar blow-up doll just in case I don't score a chick at the club. So I fuckin drive way out on Watt and wear a baseball cap and shades to sort of disguise myself since I'm a little fuckin embarrassed about walking into those places.
There's a Goldie's on Del Paso but I never go to that one in fear of someone I know driving past it and calling me out. So I went to the one way out in North Higlands.
I quickly go into the store and there's all sorts of shady people in there, including a lesbian fat couple who were looking at porn videos. I grabbed a cheap 10 dollar porn flick and then a box with a HOT looking blow-up doll and I also got a pack of condoms.
When you go into these places you have to sort of hit a zone where you're not embarrassed. I had fuckin tunnell vision going on and felt confident as I made my purchase. I walked out of the store and looked both ways. Slipped my shades on and crept to my rig and started the engine.
Fuckin car would NOT start.
Could it be a dead battery? NO. that would have been to easy. I could have jump started it at least. Anyway, I checked the engine and everything and I think it's the FUCKIN transmission. This is so unfair! WHY does it happen?
I was red as a beet and stuffed my purchases in my truck under a blanket. I panicked since I was in a bad area of town, and thought about calling my brother. But of course I didn't - that would have sucked. I thought about calling a tow truck but then that asshole would have run masturbation smack on me as we rode back to Westgate. I shivered and glanced around in panic with Tom Green wide-eyes.
SO I said fuck this, and WALKED 15 miles back home. On the way back I stopped at Subway, refusing to have my day ruined, and ate a sub while trying to not fret about my rig. I called up a co-worker Sunday night and told him my car was in the shop and that I needed a ride, so dude picked me up yesterday morning and also gave me a ride to Denny's late that afternoon for brunch. He's driving me home today and from there I'll figure out what I am going to do about my rig that's broken down in the parking lot of a damn adult bookstore. By the way, I took the condoms home but left the porno and blow-up doll in the trunk.
D-Money
