I wrote this this morning - leave feedback

  • Wanna Join? New users you can now register lightning fast using your Facebook or Twitter accounts.
JLMACN

JLMACN

JLMACN
#1
Aug 26, 2002
14,639
826
0
44
WWW.YABITCHDONEME.COM
#1
I swear to God that im worthless and nobody holds me down/
been wantin to say some shit but they think that im playin around/
whos playin around?/
not me son, cause im strapped with these loaded thoughts/
grinding hard tryin to take this shit back to hip-hop/
cause im tired of mainstream robots all over Tv/
I remember when you can spell this game P-U-R to tha E/
now-a-days they judge your music, by the car you drive, the clothes you wear, and your jewelery, nah homie dont take me there/
cause its a matter of fact that this game has gotten worthless/
we blame it on white america but we the ones makin choices/ so like that song goes "lift every voice and sing"/
i wanna hear that original shit before we got hit with the bling/
know what i mean/
nothing but drum and bass/
a show wit 2 dudes and 1 dj rockin the stage/
not you and your whole click all over the place/
but thas me and i know i dont speak for my self/
its just fucked up to see the hand hip-hop got dealt....

-jlmacn


thanks for feedback

5000
 
shep

shep

Sicc OG
#2
Oct 2, 2002
3,233
2
0
#2
wow man. that is really good shit. that is exactly how i feel, and that is why i only listen to underground music.

seriously man. you took the words out of my mouth. real nice shit
 
T

TROLL

Sicc OG
#4
Aug 8, 2003
5,360
22
0
42
#4
yeah homie that was some powerful shit right there. the rhymes were dead on what i was feelin bout the industry today. good shit, keep it comin. my fav lines..

I wanna hear that original shit before we got hit with the bling/
know what i mean/
nothing but drum and bass/
a show wit 2 dudes and 1 dj rockin the stage/
not you and your whole click all over the place/
Click to expand...
 
JLMACN

JLMACN

JLMACN
#7
Aug 26, 2002
14,639
826
0
44
WWW.YABITCHDONEME.COM
#7
thanks...

but since when do you need to rhyme every 3rd word for it to be good?

I see your raps...and i understand why you would say that...
but to me....your stuff is way to repetitive...same style over and over..

but good lookin out on the feedback..

5000
 
B

BIG CHORIZO

Sicc OG
#8
Jun 16, 2002
318
21
0
123
#8
My raps don't rhyme every third word. Sorry you got hurt and tried to fire back.. but the fact remains the rhymes are weak.

down/around
thoughts/hop
tv/E
worthless/choices doesn't even rhyme, really

Anyway you see what I'm saying? Don't get all sad..
 
JLMACN

JLMACN

JLMACN
#9
Aug 26, 2002
14,639
826
0
44
WWW.YABITCHDONEME.COM
#9
lol @ gettin all sad...

far from that homie..

i appreciated your feedback...but since you on some "im the dopest rhymer" type shit..

move around homeboy..
this "little non-rhyming" shit i wrote...means more that all your shit you put on this section put together..

pzz homie..

stay at your flow..

5000

p.s. i never said you rhyme every third word..

dont get butthurt homie..
 
B

BIG CHORIZO

Sicc OG
#10
Jun 16, 2002
318
21
0
123
#10
LOL look at her getting all hurt. The verse you posted isn't worth shit homie. It's got a concept that has been played by underground emcees for ages. So, you wanna talk some shit because you can't handle critisism, go for it. But the fact still remains your rhymes suck. End of story.
 
Soulcollector

Soulcollector

Sicc OG
#14
Dec 21, 2004
408
0
0
scd.mm-a.yimg.com
#14
BIG CHORIZO said:
LOL look at her getting all hurt. The verse you posted isn't worth shit homie. It's got a concept that has been played by underground emcees for ages. So, you wanna talk some shit because you can't handle critisism, go for it. But the fact still remains your rhymes suck. End of story.
Click to expand...

Yup, that's Chorizo , being a weenie! A big time hater, and crybaby! Chorizo always hate's when a nigg critisizes his flows, tears and tempers begin to flurr.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom