Today I didn't go to any classes. I found out I over drafted my account a cool one hundred and fifty dollars, but it didn't faze me. I had been playing online poker, and I will be cashing three times that amount in the next two weeks, so I have little to worry of. I didn't go to my classes because well, quite frankly, my professors are idiots. One doesn't even speak English.
While I'm on the subject, I've opted out of going to school and am instead going to try and come up with some lottery type idea that will make me millions. But enough of that, let me tell you about today.
Today was interesting, to say the least. Despite spending most of the day inside my grotto, I ventured out for a brief stroll along the main avenue of school to at least witness the drones hard at work. Upon my journey, I encountered a vibrant drunkard who stumbled his way to the bus stop. He was proclaiming truth and reverence, swinging his arms in the air like a magnificent composer as he shouted to the masses about prophecies and wrong doings. Nobody seemed to take notice, but on the chin of his beard I noticed a piece of steak. And this wasn't cheese steak from some local deli, no, this was fucking prime rib.
Needless to say, I didn't give him any change.
I walked about six more blocks and turned onto the parkway. It started to rain, but the tall elms and maples gave enough cover through their fading foliage that I hardly noticed the small drops fading through the leaves. I smiled as I watched a lady walking her small poodle through the leave covered pathways. A jogger, a portly woman of maybe thirty or forty, suddenly stopped me and begged for a sip of my water. I noticed her chapped lipstick and designer jogging gear.
She could afford her own water.
After the park I turned back home, realizing it was almost past three in the afternoon, and it would be getting dark soon. I stopped at the market to pick up some foods and then proceeded to walk back home. On my way, I was stopped by another homeless man, the conversation went as follows:
"Man, shit man, I need like forty-eight centz and then I can bus outta here man. I know it ain't much, it ain't much to a wealthy man like you man, sir", the man hobbled his way up to me, fingerless gloves stretched out towards me, his eyes pleading.
"Wow, you know, I just stopped at the grocery, and I think I have some change", I pulled my hand out of my pocket and looked down at the change. Forty nine cents.
"Oh man, man that'd be gracious of you sir, if I could have that change", the man's eyes gleamed as he reached towards my change.
"Well, you see, here's the thing. I was going to buy the paper, which is fifty cents, right over there. And well, when you came up to me, I was hoping I could maybe get a penny or two off of you. I mean, if every person you see gives you forty-eight cents, then surely you could spare one penny for me to get the paper, right?"
The man looked at me dumbfounded. His jaw gaping and his arms suddenly slung down to his sides. His eyes suddenly had a glazed over look, trying to contemplate the words I'd just brought across his drugged intellect.
"Oh I get it, you can keep your change, but I can't keep mine? I guess you don't want people coming up to you at random and asking you for the change that stretches your pockets, now do you? Well now you know how I feel."
I never got the paper, I've got the internet anyways.
While I'm on the subject, I've opted out of going to school and am instead going to try and come up with some lottery type idea that will make me millions. But enough of that, let me tell you about today.
Today was interesting, to say the least. Despite spending most of the day inside my grotto, I ventured out for a brief stroll along the main avenue of school to at least witness the drones hard at work. Upon my journey, I encountered a vibrant drunkard who stumbled his way to the bus stop. He was proclaiming truth and reverence, swinging his arms in the air like a magnificent composer as he shouted to the masses about prophecies and wrong doings. Nobody seemed to take notice, but on the chin of his beard I noticed a piece of steak. And this wasn't cheese steak from some local deli, no, this was fucking prime rib.
Needless to say, I didn't give him any change.
I walked about six more blocks and turned onto the parkway. It started to rain, but the tall elms and maples gave enough cover through their fading foliage that I hardly noticed the small drops fading through the leaves. I smiled as I watched a lady walking her small poodle through the leave covered pathways. A jogger, a portly woman of maybe thirty or forty, suddenly stopped me and begged for a sip of my water. I noticed her chapped lipstick and designer jogging gear.
She could afford her own water.
After the park I turned back home, realizing it was almost past three in the afternoon, and it would be getting dark soon. I stopped at the market to pick up some foods and then proceeded to walk back home. On my way, I was stopped by another homeless man, the conversation went as follows:
"Man, shit man, I need like forty-eight centz and then I can bus outta here man. I know it ain't much, it ain't much to a wealthy man like you man, sir", the man hobbled his way up to me, fingerless gloves stretched out towards me, his eyes pleading.
"Wow, you know, I just stopped at the grocery, and I think I have some change", I pulled my hand out of my pocket and looked down at the change. Forty nine cents.
"Oh man, man that'd be gracious of you sir, if I could have that change", the man's eyes gleamed as he reached towards my change.
"Well, you see, here's the thing. I was going to buy the paper, which is fifty cents, right over there. And well, when you came up to me, I was hoping I could maybe get a penny or two off of you. I mean, if every person you see gives you forty-eight cents, then surely you could spare one penny for me to get the paper, right?"
The man looked at me dumbfounded. His jaw gaping and his arms suddenly slung down to his sides. His eyes suddenly had a glazed over look, trying to contemplate the words I'd just brought across his drugged intellect.
"Oh I get it, you can keep your change, but I can't keep mine? I guess you don't want people coming up to you at random and asking you for the change that stretches your pockets, now do you? Well now you know how I feel."
I never got the paper, I've got the internet anyways.
