1. DON'T COMMIT VIOLENT CRIMES.
I know may seem very elementary, but this rule is lost on many. They do the crime, get shot, and then wonder how it could possibly happen. They whine that it is unfair. One must realize that violent crime, like jumping in front of moving cars, is just a high risk occupation, and, in case it has escaped your understanding, committing violent crimes make police officers think you may not be a good person.
2. If you ignore rule No. 1, and the police do confront you, DON'T RUN AWAY FROM THEM. I know it's hard to believe, but that may make them think you're guilty of something. Hiding in bushes or closets makes some police officers, (mostly older ones), very nervous. They might even foolishly conclude that you're up to no good!
3. If you disregard rules 1 and 2, and the cops catch up with you anyway and inform you that you are under arrest, DON'T MAKE FAST MOVEMENTS WITH YOUR HANDS. I know it sounds silly, but grabbing a shiny beer can, a dark colored wallet, or one of those snazzy and real looking replica guns may make police officers mistakenly believe that you are about to hurt them.
4. If you disregard rules 1, 2, and 3, and manage to get what looks like a deadly weapon into your hands, DON'T POINT IT AT THE COPS. We all know that you're basically a nice person, but the police officers confronting you may tend to overlook this and they may even believe they need to protect themselves.
5. If you disregard rules 1, 2, 3, and 4, DON'T BE ASTONISHED IF THE COPS DO NOT INSTANTLY TURN INTO YOUR PERSONAL CONFIDANTE. They may be too preoccupied to realize that you're normally a splendid person and that you're just having a bad day. They may be too preoccupied to see that when you point a weapon at them in a threatening manner, it is just your way of crying out for help. We both know that the whole problem can be traced to the fact that your mother didn't breast feed you, but some police officers are so cynical they just don't see it.
I know may seem very elementary, but this rule is lost on many. They do the crime, get shot, and then wonder how it could possibly happen. They whine that it is unfair. One must realize that violent crime, like jumping in front of moving cars, is just a high risk occupation, and, in case it has escaped your understanding, committing violent crimes make police officers think you may not be a good person.
2. If you ignore rule No. 1, and the police do confront you, DON'T RUN AWAY FROM THEM. I know it's hard to believe, but that may make them think you're guilty of something. Hiding in bushes or closets makes some police officers, (mostly older ones), very nervous. They might even foolishly conclude that you're up to no good!
3. If you disregard rules 1 and 2, and the cops catch up with you anyway and inform you that you are under arrest, DON'T MAKE FAST MOVEMENTS WITH YOUR HANDS. I know it sounds silly, but grabbing a shiny beer can, a dark colored wallet, or one of those snazzy and real looking replica guns may make police officers mistakenly believe that you are about to hurt them.
4. If you disregard rules 1, 2, and 3, and manage to get what looks like a deadly weapon into your hands, DON'T POINT IT AT THE COPS. We all know that you're basically a nice person, but the police officers confronting you may tend to overlook this and they may even believe they need to protect themselves.
5. If you disregard rules 1, 2, 3, and 4, DON'T BE ASTONISHED IF THE COPS DO NOT INSTANTLY TURN INTO YOUR PERSONAL CONFIDANTE. They may be too preoccupied to realize that you're normally a splendid person and that you're just having a bad day. They may be too preoccupied to see that when you point a weapon at them in a threatening manner, it is just your way of crying out for help. We both know that the whole problem can be traced to the fact that your mother didn't breast feed you, but some police officers are so cynical they just don't see it.