I drove to the business park where I gunned down a fuckin goose a year ago. It was a nice sunny day and I thought I'd go out and work on my tan. So I put on my bathing suit, shirt and sandles and parked in a parking lot outside some huge office building. I walked into the field, stepping over goose shit, and went by the lake in a nice clean mossy area and took my shirt off and plopped my ass down. I Enjoyed the warm sun on my epic chest, face and legs. I brought some mini-binoculars so that I could look way out at the lake.
After about a solid 20 minutes of tanning and enjoying nature, I started to get a hard on. I reached under my bathing suit and yanked off like a savage. The thrill of jerking in public was a nice turn-on, but it only got better.....across the lake I saw a chick jogging down the road, and I grabbed my binoculars. I held them to my eyes with my left hand and almost passed out when I saw thems boobies rhythmnically bounching on each step. Her tight ass moving beneath the spandex. At that point I didn't give a fuck if anyone saw me. I dropped my swimtrunks and did a full-fledged EDJ-styled yank-off right there, and it took no time.
Right after I spooged I got nervous and pulled my swimtrunks back up and thought about what a jackass I was to do that but FUCK you would have done the same (i.e. Juan Million). I closed my eyes, sank in some sun, and about 2 minutes later got reay to leave. Then, the HORRAH.
I look to my left and see a fuckin green cop car rolling around in the parking lot. My heart was pounding like a Jackhammer Jesus. Did they watch ME with binoculars in the building and see me beating off in public? FUCK! I put my shirt on and put the mini-binoculars in my pocket and tried to act normal. Then the car came to a stop. I walked up to the grassy area and acted like I didn't see that pig's car as I had my shades on. Suddenly the cop gets on his loudspeaker...."Hello!"
I looked over and threw up a peace sign. Then he goes, "Come to the car!"
Motherfucker!
Like an Inglewood special ed. student who learned his lesson, I respected these orders and didn't walk, but RAN, towards the car, since I was a good ways away. I ran with my head up like the fonkyfresh Noble that I am.
Thousands of thought swirled in my head. I thought about my mug shot for indecent exposure (being hung up somwhere next to Tim's other three). I thought about jail. I thought about calling my OL and having to explain that I was in jail for masturbating in public. I thought about it going on my record. Oh shit, if only I'd WAITED to beat off until I got home! You IDIOT, Deep, WHY did you have to blow your wad there?
Finally I approached the cop, who was out of his car. I saluted him. "Do you have permission to be by the lake," he asked.
"Err...I guess I need permission?"
He said, "Yes....I don't know if there are any signs on this side of the lake about no trespassing, fishing, hunting or trapping...." he looked around for signs....
He goes, "Okay, they must not have put one up here...." I go, "I didn't see one. I've never been here before....Just came here to jog and then thought I'd check out the lake."
Cop goes, "Did you leave anything over there that you need to go get?" I go, "Nah...." I just blasted a load there, that's all.
He asked me for my liscence and registration, which I gave him with trembling hands. He looked at them and said, "Ok, thanks. Just stay off the property...we can't have people out here or else people will litter."
"No problem," I said.
He got in his rig and I got in my rig and drove off, laughing my ass off....
I've buried a blowup doll in the woods there and shot a fuckin goose at night and now jacked off in public there while watching a hot ass and two boobs jog by.
Getting the fuck OVER must be my purpose in life.
D-Money
After about a solid 20 minutes of tanning and enjoying nature, I started to get a hard on. I reached under my bathing suit and yanked off like a savage. The thrill of jerking in public was a nice turn-on, but it only got better.....across the lake I saw a chick jogging down the road, and I grabbed my binoculars. I held them to my eyes with my left hand and almost passed out when I saw thems boobies rhythmnically bounching on each step. Her tight ass moving beneath the spandex. At that point I didn't give a fuck if anyone saw me. I dropped my swimtrunks and did a full-fledged EDJ-styled yank-off right there, and it took no time.
Right after I spooged I got nervous and pulled my swimtrunks back up and thought about what a jackass I was to do that but FUCK you would have done the same (i.e. Juan Million). I closed my eyes, sank in some sun, and about 2 minutes later got reay to leave. Then, the HORRAH.
I look to my left and see a fuckin green cop car rolling around in the parking lot. My heart was pounding like a Jackhammer Jesus. Did they watch ME with binoculars in the building and see me beating off in public? FUCK! I put my shirt on and put the mini-binoculars in my pocket and tried to act normal. Then the car came to a stop. I walked up to the grassy area and acted like I didn't see that pig's car as I had my shades on. Suddenly the cop gets on his loudspeaker...."Hello!"
I looked over and threw up a peace sign. Then he goes, "Come to the car!"
Motherfucker!
Like an Inglewood special ed. student who learned his lesson, I respected these orders and didn't walk, but RAN, towards the car, since I was a good ways away. I ran with my head up like the fonkyfresh Noble that I am.
Thousands of thought swirled in my head. I thought about my mug shot for indecent exposure (being hung up somwhere next to Tim's other three). I thought about jail. I thought about calling my OL and having to explain that I was in jail for masturbating in public. I thought about it going on my record. Oh shit, if only I'd WAITED to beat off until I got home! You IDIOT, Deep, WHY did you have to blow your wad there?
Finally I approached the cop, who was out of his car. I saluted him. "Do you have permission to be by the lake," he asked.
"Err...I guess I need permission?"
He said, "Yes....I don't know if there are any signs on this side of the lake about no trespassing, fishing, hunting or trapping...." he looked around for signs....
He goes, "Okay, they must not have put one up here...." I go, "I didn't see one. I've never been here before....Just came here to jog and then thought I'd check out the lake."
Cop goes, "Did you leave anything over there that you need to go get?" I go, "Nah...." I just blasted a load there, that's all.
He asked me for my liscence and registration, which I gave him with trembling hands. He looked at them and said, "Ok, thanks. Just stay off the property...we can't have people out here or else people will litter."
"No problem," I said.
He got in his rig and I got in my rig and drove off, laughing my ass off....
I've buried a blowup doll in the woods there and shot a fuckin goose at night and now jacked off in public there while watching a hot ass and two boobs jog by.
Getting the fuck OVER must be my purpose in life.
D-Money
