I once was pushed into a deep hole by a wave while surfing in Santa Barbara. I could touch the sides of the hole as far up as I could reach and it was deep enough that I could touch the bottom with my feet. When I sprang up I was immediately pushed back into the hole by the next wave in the set. With complete panic and closing in on seconds before I would have to either take a breath of air or breathe the seawater into my lungs I sprang up again and took a sweet breath of air but the third wave crushed me and I coughed it back up. I wasn't pushed back into the hole this time, I was in that place where the power of the water is rushing around you mixed with sand and twirling your body around to the point that you don't know what direction to swim for. I was lost. I had no energy left to fight. I could feel my soul slipping.
Then I was pulled up by my friend who I was surfing with. Paramedics and a whole fucking crew of people met us at the breakers carried me to shore and tried to convince me to go to the hospital they had a goddamned ambulance on the beach! I refused to go, I felt fine, just a little tired. I tried to thank my friend but he refused my gesture he told me that he didn't even know I was getting hammered, he didn't notice my board washed up, he was just paddling back out for the next set when he felt my arm by chance as he treaded.
When I got my energy back I walked down the beach to recover my board. One of the life guards approached me to ask how I was I told him I was fine and he said:
"you have quite a friend there. me and the other lifeguards gave up trying to find you we but he stayed out there fighting against set after set for almost an hour and he found you. Its amazing!"
"What? I was only out there for five or ten minutes"
"No man, you were out there a long time. We gave up hope of finding you alive, except for your friend. You may think you were out there for a few minutes but you must have been in mild shock or something. It is amazing that he found you"
My friend didn't want to be a hero. He didn't want to take credit. He didn't want acknowledgment of any kind. I respected his wishes and never let on that I knew what he had done for me. I made up my mind that whenever that guy needed help with anything working on his car, a loan, a ride, any damn thing I was gonna be there for him.
Unfortunately I was never able to repay my debt to my friend. He committed suicide 2 weeks after saving my life. He was 19 years old.
If you are hoping for an explanation as to why he would take his life, I don't have one.
If you are curious about the details of his death. I will not offer them.
If you feel robbed, I'm with you.
Then I was pulled up by my friend who I was surfing with. Paramedics and a whole fucking crew of people met us at the breakers carried me to shore and tried to convince me to go to the hospital they had a goddamned ambulance on the beach! I refused to go, I felt fine, just a little tired. I tried to thank my friend but he refused my gesture he told me that he didn't even know I was getting hammered, he didn't notice my board washed up, he was just paddling back out for the next set when he felt my arm by chance as he treaded.
When I got my energy back I walked down the beach to recover my board. One of the life guards approached me to ask how I was I told him I was fine and he said:
"you have quite a friend there. me and the other lifeguards gave up trying to find you we but he stayed out there fighting against set after set for almost an hour and he found you. Its amazing!"
"What? I was only out there for five or ten minutes"
"No man, you were out there a long time. We gave up hope of finding you alive, except for your friend. You may think you were out there for a few minutes but you must have been in mild shock or something. It is amazing that he found you"
My friend didn't want to be a hero. He didn't want to take credit. He didn't want acknowledgment of any kind. I respected his wishes and never let on that I knew what he had done for me. I made up my mind that whenever that guy needed help with anything working on his car, a loan, a ride, any damn thing I was gonna be there for him.
Unfortunately I was never able to repay my debt to my friend. He committed suicide 2 weeks after saving my life. He was 19 years old.
If you are hoping for an explanation as to why he would take his life, I don't have one.
If you are curious about the details of his death. I will not offer them.
If you feel robbed, I'm with you.
