My name is Willie Thomas. I once was a member of a well know gang. In 1980, I was locked up for shooting a rival gang member who transgressed against one of my gang family members. At the time I thought that I was doing the right thing, you know? - standing tall through it all; showing my unconditional love and commitment for my homies!
My journey down this road of organized confusion began in 1975. I didn’t get along with my step-dad, so to avoid the daily conflict with him I would go to the neighborhood park and hang with my so-called friends. We mostly spent our time together drinking, getting high, and telling our sad stories of how no one cared about us or understood us, and as time went by we began to function as a group!
We made commitments to each other but we never disrespected ourselves by turning into puppets. We all functioned together daily, but with our own identities and freedom to be ourselves and make decisions for ourselves! That is something that is really not a part of today’s gang mentality. No one seems to have their own identity, which basically means there aren’t any “men” or “women” in today’s gangs. It’s just a bunch of “kids” who are followers! Another thing that’s very different in gangs today is that they don’t respect anyone including themselves. The first rule of success is learn to respect yourself. You will make better decisions in your life and you will want more for yourself out of life!
Now let me enlighten you on what exposed me to the fact that gangbangin’ (what some call a second family) is B.S. Here’s the conclusion to my story: What made it clear to me that my misguided loyalty to my gang family was a waste of time was the fact that over the last 24 years, not one of my homeboys or homegirls has wrote me a letter, sent me a care package, or even came to pay me a visit! But you know who was there for me “standing tall through it all”? - my mother and that same step-dad I had tried so hard to escape from!
Tell me, can you see the irony in this picture?
The moral to my story is simple: love and respect yourself and know yourself! Then you’ll recognize that a real friendship starts with yourself. Also respect your parents, because when all the smoke clears, they’ll be the only ones still on your side and by your side.