quick clubbish track

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Apr 8, 2005
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#1
just some stupid quick lyrics, but here it is, its the newest shit ive done that isnt going on my album

best to get it straight, no debate, im a factor in this shit,
spit fire, spit tracks, and spit hella game to yur bitch,
she might switch cause i go......
and if it come to disrespect, best believe that i throw,
number one up in the hood, and for good reasoning,
i go for days, weeks months, man fuck the whole year,
feel the tension when the mention of my name gets near,
my peers know they aint never seein me, or bein me,
even gettin that close is like you becomin a g,
it wont happen, thats why im up here steady laughin,
steady graspin on the fuckin cash, that im mashin to get,
straight smashin the whip, and stashin the clip, whatever it takes,
to see breaks, and the steady stackin of chips,
im out to get it, hit it up quick with the heavy slapper,
keepin my pimp hand strong for smackin every rapper,
out the game,its time for a change,
and i go!!!!

im verse 2

http://www.zshare.net/audio/9008673460f486/
 

Defy

Cannabis Connoisseur
Jan 23, 2006
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Rich City
#2
I didn't like the first half of your verse, it was too simple and I wasn't getting how it would be spit as I read it....I scrolled down and saw the link and listened and it hella picked up at the second half, using better & more words to rhyme with. (mashin the whip, stashin the clip, stackin the chips) I liked that....I just wished the first half was like that. the simpleness doesn't work with your kind of flow on there because you don't rap the conventional way of "end of bar 1 rhymes with end of bar 2", like you're rhyming but its not as structured, although it does work with the second half cuz its more 'rhyme like this then bring it back'.
 
Apr 8, 2005
6,128
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#5
I didn't like the first half of your verse, it was too simple and I wasn't getting how it would be spit as I read it....I scrolled down and saw the link and listened and it hella picked up at the second half, using better & more words to rhyme with. (mashin the whip, stashin the clip, stackin the chips) I liked that....I just wished the first half was like that. the simpleness doesn't work with your kind of flow on there because you don't rap the conventional way of "end of bar 1 rhymes with end of bar 2", like you're rhyming but its not as structured, although it does work with the second half cuz its more 'rhyme like this then bring it back'.
thanx for the feed by the way, i always have that problem, one part of a verse will outshine the fuck outta the other, ill work on that



anyone else wanna feed this?
 
Feb 15, 2003
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#7
i agree with defys response.. i wasn't feelin it that much when i read it.. but then when i listened to it and heard how you spit it. it came off pretty clean.. good job mayne... oh and watch out for them horseshoes... hah