I'M BAK WITH A FEW JOKES. ENJOY.....
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
---------------------------------------------------------
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
---------------------------------------------------------
Why does a man have a hole in his penis?
To get some air to his brain.
--------------------------------------------------------
What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
The position of the dirt bag.
---------------------------------------------------------
What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
One US leader.
---------------------------------------------------------
How can you tell when a man's had an orgasm?
From the snoring.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? Doughnuts.
---------------------------------------------------------
Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do you get when you put 50 lesbians
and 50 politicians in a room together?
100 people who don't do dick.
---------------------------------------------------------
What does parsley and pubic hair have in common?
You push it aside and keep on eating!
---------------------------------------------------------
How did the tugboat get AIDs?
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
---------------------------------------------------------
A man came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon.
That way a woman can be at her best when she is at her
worst.
---------------------------------------------------------
What does a 72-year-old snatch taste like?
Oh,,,Depends...?
---------------------------------------------------------
Define "Egghead:"
What Mrs. Dumpty gives to Humpty.
---------------------------------------------------------
What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?
Popeye almost killed him!
---------------------------------------------------------
What's the definition of a teenager?
God's punishment for enjoying sex.
---------------------------------------------------------
What two words will clear out a men's restroom?
"Nice Dick!"
---------------------------------------------------------
What's the definition of eternity?
4 blondes at a 4-way stop intersection.
---------------------------------------------------------
How do you know if a guy has a high sperm count?
His girlfriend has to chew before swallowing!
---------------------------------------------------------
Mom's have Mother's Day,
Father's have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do a dildo and soy beans have in common?
They are both used as substitute meat.
--------------------------------------------------------
Why is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a good hand, you don't need a partner.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do a coffin and a condom have in common?
They're both filled with stiffs, only one's coming and
one's going.
---------------------------------------------------------
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a hell of a
blowjob!
---------------------------------------------------------
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your pecker.
-------------------------------------------------------
How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
It's not hard.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
---------------------------------------------------------
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
---------------------------------------------------------
Why does a man have a hole in his penis?
To get some air to his brain.
--------------------------------------------------------
What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
The position of the dirt bag.
---------------------------------------------------------
What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
One US leader.
---------------------------------------------------------
How can you tell when a man's had an orgasm?
From the snoring.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? Doughnuts.
---------------------------------------------------------
Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do you get when you put 50 lesbians
and 50 politicians in a room together?
100 people who don't do dick.
---------------------------------------------------------
What does parsley and pubic hair have in common?
You push it aside and keep on eating!
---------------------------------------------------------
How did the tugboat get AIDs?
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
---------------------------------------------------------
A man came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon.
That way a woman can be at her best when she is at her
worst.
---------------------------------------------------------
What does a 72-year-old snatch taste like?
Oh,,,Depends...?
---------------------------------------------------------
Define "Egghead:"
What Mrs. Dumpty gives to Humpty.
---------------------------------------------------------
What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?
Popeye almost killed him!
---------------------------------------------------------
What's the definition of a teenager?
God's punishment for enjoying sex.
---------------------------------------------------------
What two words will clear out a men's restroom?
"Nice Dick!"
---------------------------------------------------------
What's the definition of eternity?
4 blondes at a 4-way stop intersection.
---------------------------------------------------------
How do you know if a guy has a high sperm count?
His girlfriend has to chew before swallowing!
---------------------------------------------------------
Mom's have Mother's Day,
Father's have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do a dildo and soy beans have in common?
They are both used as substitute meat.
--------------------------------------------------------
Why is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a good hand, you don't need a partner.
---------------------------------------------------------
What do a coffin and a condom have in common?
They're both filled with stiffs, only one's coming and
one's going.
---------------------------------------------------------
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a hell of a
blowjob!
---------------------------------------------------------
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your pecker.
-------------------------------------------------------
How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
It's not hard.
