" Going to war without France is like going to war without your accordian" - Norman Swartzkopf
" I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me" - General George Patton
"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came into Paris under a German flag" -David Letterman
" I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France" - Jay Leno
" France has neithwer winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France is usually governed by prostitutes" - Mark Twain
"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure" - Jacques Chirac, President of France. "As far as France is concerned, your're right" - Rush Limbaugh
There was a Frenchman, an Englishman, and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriage and it went completely dark. Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Englishman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Frenchman had his hand across his face as if he had been slapped there. The Frenchman was thinking ' The English fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead'. Claudia Schiffer was thinking ' The French fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it'. And the Englishman was thinking: ' This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel.... I'll make another kissing noise and slap that French bastard again'.
" I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me" - General George Patton
"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came into Paris under a German flag" -David Letterman
" I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France" - Jay Leno
" France has neithwer winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France is usually governed by prostitutes" - Mark Twain
"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure" - Jacques Chirac, President of France. "As far as France is concerned, your're right" - Rush Limbaugh
There was a Frenchman, an Englishman, and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriage and it went completely dark. Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Englishman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Frenchman had his hand across his face as if he had been slapped there. The Frenchman was thinking ' The English fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead'. Claudia Schiffer was thinking ' The French fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it'. And the Englishman was thinking: ' This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel.... I'll make another kissing noise and slap that French bastard again'.
